Curiosity is a natural thing

It's a natural curiosity to know why I limp, and of course NOW you can't ask me, ha ha (after my last FB status and conversation)!  I wish it was as exciting as surviving a train wreck or as heroic as having served in the armed forces (are women allowed to fight yet?), but this is the boring, and long-winded, truth:

I was born with congenital hip dislocation, which means my left hip was dislocated when I was born due to a misshapen hip socket.  The doctors were able to re-locate the hip joint, but did not or could not fix the socket deformity (I've been told that had I been born 10 years later, they could have fixed everything 100%).  "Congenital" means I was born with it and it probably developed like that in the womb.  Sometimes these things happen, and it's nothing to do with anything my mom did or anything like that.  It's amazing to me the process ever works at all! (the process of developing a human body)

Anyway, the malformed hip socket causes the hip joint to rest higher than my right hip, which makes one leg longer than the other, and thus, I limp.  Also, because of the weird socket and hip placement, my gait is not normal.  In addition, I'm missing some of the important cartilage needed for proper joint function, and it is wearing down over the years.  It's like the ball and socket are grinding against each other without any lubrication.  It does this in everyone over time, but the process in mine has been accelerated.  So it causes arthritis and bursitis, and can be painful, but the pain can be managed.

When I was 11 years old, I had surgery on my right knee.  I can't tell you the technical term, but they "scraped the growth line" from that knee so that leg would stop growing in the hopes that my left leg would catch up.  I think that helped, as in, I think the length discrepancy is less than it would have been.  The discrepancy obviously still exists though.  (and there is your explanation for the scars on my right knee)

The pain comes and goes, and has everything to do with whether I'm doing strength training or not.  I need to keep those ligaments and tendons as strong as possible so they can do their job in supporting the bum hip.  Right now, I am not doing my part.

Being pregnant with the twins and the spreading of the hips and the weight they have to support, along with my age, has made the hip pain noticeably worse.  Sometimes I am not just limping due to one leg being longer than the other, but due to actual pain.  Again, the pain can be managed, and I often forget to take anything.

Because of the wear and tear on the hip, I was told as a child that I would have to get hip replacement surgery by the time I reached 30.  I am now 42.  I've talked to several doctors about it, and b/c the wear and tear is not too bad yet, relatively speaking, they want me to wait as long as I can, as long as we can manage the pain.  The reason why is because hip replacements do not last forever (people usually get them when they are way older), and we want to limit the number of surgeries I'll have to have.  Makes sense to me.

Anyway, this is why I get bummed when I have to explain to people when I'm not prepared to do so.  It's not a simple explanation.

Writing this makes me want to get a handicap parking pass, since I am limping and all!!  Also, I need to work out again.

Pumpkin The Cat

Our 14-year old cat Pumpkin is sick. She has hyperthyroidism. She isn't acting too sick yet, like you would imagine a sick cat acting. The worst symptom is that she is literally bone thin. At her healthiest peak years ago she weighed 14 pounds, and was a tad overweight. Now she weighs a measly 8.6 pounds. She is so thin, that she can fit through the bars of our baby gates (we still have 2 up, a) to keep Ballou out of the cat food room [it has a little cat door in it] and b) to keep all animals out of Jude's room.)

A cat's heart rate at rest should be around 120-150. At its most excited it could get up to 200. Her heart rate was almost 300 at the vet!

After her thyroid test, they told me normal levels would be 0.8 to 4.0. Hers was 10.8. So yeah, she's sick.

The poor kitty is hungry all the time, but has a hard time eating. She can't sit still long enough to eat, and then some of the time she eats so fast, she quickly regurgitates it. And this whole time that I noticed she was losing weight, I kept thinking, "but she's so active! Look at her! She can't be sick!", but really, it was just her over-active thyroid making her spaz out.

The three options:

1) Iodine shot - $1500

- At the local university, not the vet. She would be radioactive for a couple of weeks, so would have to stay there for that long while guys in space suits took care of her.

**Pros - It's a sure shot cure, like, pretty much 100%.
**Cons - The price. Also, she's old, and I don't like the idea of stressing her out further. She's a stressed out cat with strangers as it is, and I just don't like the isolation space suit idea. And although they said the radioactivity would be out of her system in a couple of weeks, radioactivity sorta concerns me since I am pregnant. Also, dealing with the local university vet school is a pain for various reasons.

2) Surgery - $350-$400

-At the vet. They would remove the nodules from her thyroid.

**Pros - Less expensive, not a complicated surgery, not too invasive, she would be home the same day and back to her normal self in 2 days or less. All of her other tests came back normal, so even though she is old, she is healthy enough to do this. They have a good success rate with this method.
**Cons - Although there is a high success rate, it also may not work. There is a chance that the nodules could come back. However, it wouldn't be right away; it'd be years, so either she'd have passed away from old age by then, or we could just put her on meds (see below).

3) Medicine - $35 a month

- A swab of solution you put on her ear twice daily

**Pros - Completely non-invasive, cheaper in the short-term, less stress on Pumpkin
**Cons - Time-consuming...are we really going to have time for this, especially once two more babies come? We barely remember to give Ballou her heart worm medication, and that's just once a month. Plus, we have to go to a special pharmacy for it, which is totally inconvenient, both the location and the service. I've used them before. Less stress for Pumpkin, but more stress for us.

Plus two more options that the Vet did not mention, but which exist nonetheless:

4) Do nothing.

The problem with this is that she is going to get worse, and aside from the obvious cruelty, there is also the high chance that she is going to start peeing all over our house. This is one of the side effects of this disease.

5) Put her to sleep.

I would do this over #4. It's not a bad solution. She is 14 years old after all. However, I just feel like if you choose to accept the responsibility of owning a pet, you can't just dump them off or kill them, even humanely, b/c they have become inconvenient for you. If it was going to be thousands of dollars, sure, we have to be realistic. But we can handle a few hundred dollars, I think. Not my ideal way to spend money, but again, I think we should accept our responsibilities when it comes to pets.


An interesting coincidence is that our cat Scamper died when I was pregnant with Jude. He just suddenly dropped dead though (we think a brain tumor or stroke), and I hate to overuse this word, but I mean, literally, he just suddenly dropped dead. In so many ways, that was easier. I was sad to see him go and it was a bit of a shock, and I still miss him, but what an easy way to die. He did not suffer that we know of, and we did not have to make any hard decisions, nor spend much money.

Matt and I jokingly theorize that the pets sense I'm pregnant and they get stressed, making them sicker. Can't they just be happy for me? ;-)

Too Many Blogs

In trying to compartmentalize my life, I somehow got myself into a blogging frenzy that's quite time-consuming (well it would be, if I kept up with them all), and tedious. I'm making things more complicated, I'm afraid.

My Four Blogs:

1) Procrastination Station - I like to use this blog to basically "go to town", to say what I want w/o thinking much about it, w/o thinking of hurting people's feelings, or without thinking about my mom gasping at what I say. It's kinda funny I have an audience at all. Most of the people that read this are people I have met online, through other blogs and forums. I do have 1 or 2 real life friends that read this, or at least know about it.

2) The Chronicles of Jude - Obviously, to write all about Jude

3) 2 Peas in a Pod + Jude - I have not made this public yet, but this is my blog about my current twin pregnancy. I give progress reports, including weight changes and belly pics. It's just a personal journal, so would probably be boring to anyone but me. I go into great detail on my thoughts, and get personal about gas and boobs and other fun topics to talk about when you are pregnant.

4) 2 Peas in a Pod + a Green Bean - The above 3 are on Blogger.com. This one is in our local newspaper, the online version. It's different from #3 in that I have a more public audience (well, theoretically...I don't think I really have one yet) that I must think about when I write, which means I can't get too long-winded, too boring, or too personal (although I've already mentioned that my farts smell like roses on that blog).


I think the main problem is with Blog #1..this blog, in fact. Why so secretive? Do I have something to hide? I already and purposely don't spend a lot of time bitching about family and friends. I guess....what if I want to talk about sex like I did on the porn post...some of you would find that interesting...but my mom? Other friends? Not sure.

I probably should just be myself. I think I should write what I want within reason, and my mom and others will have to learn how to deal. That's what real writers do, right? They write books with questionable content but they don't think, "Oooh..I shouldn't put this in here b/c what if Mom sees it. I don't want her to see me using the word 'Fuck'".

So I should just make this one known to my family and forget about it. Of course, that would mean I'd have to delete this post, b/c my mom wouldn't like me talking about her like this.

That still leaves me with 3 other blogs. I like having the separate Jude blog to keep all of that in one place, although I could just as easily tag the Jude entries on this blog if I wanted to keep track of them all. The the two Peas blogs...I really need those two to be separate. There is a lot more detail I want to keep track of than what I want to put on the local newspaper blog. And I don't want to quit doing the local newspaper blog b/c it makes me feel important, even though no one reads it.

I guess I'm right back where I started then with four blogs.

Discovering the Main Differnece Between a Boy and a Girl

This is one of those types of stories where I have nowhere else to post it but here; a more public forum would never do. It's in the TMI category, but usually TMI=hilarious to me, especially when it's about me. Most people who read this blog know this about me, so I really cannot feel sorry for you for continuing to read this. :)

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It happened. My son noticed that I don't have a penis.

He knows I'm pregnant, and knows my belly will get bigger, as it is already.

Last night I had my night shirt/pajamas on (like a t-shirt pajama thing), and I don't wear underwear with my pajamas (see...the TMI has already started...I just cannot stand underwear when I sleep...too constrictive).

So he lifts up my pajamas to check out the progress of my belly, which he does check out my belly, but then the following conversation ensues (after I'm fully covered again, btw):

Jude: You don't have a penis!

Karla: Yep, you are right!

Jude: What do you have then?

Karla: A vagina.

J: A vagina?

K: A vagina.

J: A vagina?

K: A vagina. Boys have penises, girls have vaginas.

J: Why???

K: Because that is just the way we are made.

J: Why???

K: Because we just are.

J: Why???

K: Because that is the way Mother Nature made us.

J: Why???

K: Well, that is just how we fit together.

J: Fit together???

Oops...not quite ready for that conversation yet. But luckily, he gets distracted in my hesitation and moves on. But, he remembers what he saw, because later...

Before bed I help him go potty, and as he is pulling his undies back on, he declares:

"I don't have hair on my balls like you do."

But I repeat myself...

I always wonder what people mean by saying "again" before allegedly repeating themselves.

Example:

You are discussing with another person the ins and outs of something, or discussing how to do something, or you are brainstorming, or something similar, especially say in a work situation - a more formal conversation.

You ask a question, or bring up an idea.

The other person replies with:

"Again, you really need to consider points A, B, and C before making this decision" ... or just, "Again"...and any point after that....with a strong emphasis on Again.

I think one would say "again" in this fashion for one of two reasons:

1) You know you are repeating yourself, or you are unsure whether or not you are repeating yourself, and you want to acknowledge that you are or may be repeating yourself, and that's exactly what you do, acknowledge the repeat, when you say "again". So then the person you are conversing with won't think , 'yeah yeah, you already said that...don't you know you said that?". By saying "again", you are saying you know you already said that, but you have some good reason to say it a second time.

2) You are being a condescending prick by basically saying, "Are you not listening? well, b/c you asked me already before and I have already given you the answer, let me let you know that I am unnecessarily repeating myself by saying 'Again'."


I think I've used "again" before like this, and I think I started out using it for reason #1, but ended up feeling like I was inadvertently using it for reason #2.

Again, I wonder about this. These are the types of mindless things I wonder about in my spare time.

New Post...

...to get rid of the word "shit" in some people's blog feeds, heh. Sorry 'bout that.

This was from something I posted yesterday...a complaint of a personal nature...that I decided was too personal and so I deleted it. Although the title of the post was Shit Drunk Love, I can assure you it had nothing to do with *me* being drunk. ;-)

Notes To Self

1) Never do that thing where you take one normal self-photo with somebody else, and then you take take one "goofy" photo right after that, and then post them all online.

This is petty, but people do that on Facebook all the time. Here is my theory: It's funny if you do it once, maybe twice, but totally randomly. If you do at every photo op and on purpose and staged, it loses it's flair.

I remember the first time I saw a friend of mine do this. In the first series of photos she posted, there was a picture of her and a friend, a cute, smiling picture, and then the next picture was a goofy face picture. "Aw, how cute! So funny and spontaneous! Ha ha!", I thought.

And now, on every series of photos of she posts, there are 1-5 photos that follow this pattern - smiles, then goofy, and all in that self-portrait style where you hold the camera yourself, so it's an extreme close-up of a goofy face.

I just looked at someone else's profile, and she did the same thing in her albums. On every photo. No, I mean every photo. One sweet smile followed by one goofy. And seriously contorted face tongue sticking out goofy. And she was making the same face in every photo. And I don't know this girl...a friend was linked to her photo...heh. FB stalking. Anyway...

Instead of spontaneous goofiness, I can hear it going like this:

"Let's take a picture of ourselves! Here we go!"
(holds camera up)
(they both smile)

"Okay, now let's make a goofy face. Wouldn't that be fun?"

(holds camera up)
(goofy face ensues)
(giggles)
(look at goofy face on screen)
(hysterical crack up)


So what is my problem anyway? Hell, I don't know. I'm just calling it as I see it. It looks stupid to do it over and over again. That is, if you are 35 years old. Teenagers and kids are allowed these things.

2) Never touch my privates in public.

I was driving down the road today, because that is usually what we drive down, and I see this pretty good looking kid, a potential incoming freshman, "adjust" himself, while walking beside his mom.* I don't mean just quickly touching himself, but a full-on, all out adjustment. His hand was down there forever, and he was aggressively moving his junk all over the place. And like I said, he was a good looking kid in nice clothes with a normal looking mom. Are these things really not frowned upon by anyone else but me?

*I know this was a freshman and his mother b/c the next few weeks are "Days on Campus" here at the college, where new h.s. graduates visit the college with their parents to see if they want to attend, so kids and parents are everywhere. I mean, maybe it wasn't his mom, but a guardian, but it doesn't matter. She looked very mom-like, and then I wondered if I look mom-like, too. The moms all have this same look about them...

Jude is new to underwear right now. He has been touching himself a lot. It's a new sensation for him. But he's two. I am working on figuring out how to teach him to not touch himself except for in private, w/o making him think this is a dirty and gross thing, his penis, b/c I want him to have a healthy sexual attitude and to NOT feel shame. Maybe some moms never get around to explaining these things for this reason, and then men end up grabbing themselves in public until they die.

3) Drive closer to the car in front of me.

I won't really do that, but this happens to me a lot: I try to leave a reasonable amount of space between me and the car in front of me. I think you should leave more space than people want to, especially when going 60 mph. Invariably, someone in the other lane always decides that my safe space would be a perfect fit for their vehicle.

That happened this morning. And I knew she was going to do it. You know, you can just tell. It's like the car exhibits the driver's emotions.

So she zoomed over in my safe space, wherein I was forced to back off and leave another safe space. (but I always stay there for a second, to show them just how close they are, as if they give a shit. I sort of pretend I didn't even notice that they got in my space, and then suddenly, hell, there they are!)

And if *that* wasn't bad enough....I mean, I actually can handle it if they then keep up with traffic. I'd rather have them in front of me than tailgating me. But as if that wasn't bad enough, she starts driving very slowly while looking down at something. At first I thought, make-up. But then I realized it had to be - texting. So she got in the left "fast" passing lane...to hurry up and get distracted and slow down, to text.

She was going about 45-50 I'd say (in a 55), and was way, way behind the car that was in front of her, that used to be in front of me. So, going against my mantra from the other day of not ever reacting again at drivers, I honked at her. Not a long, obnoxious honk. Just a little beep to let her know she was holding up traffic.

She looked up at me, but kept going the same speed until we stopped at a red light. Then when it turned green, she took off really fast, way ahead of me. Ha ha!

My theory on that is that she wanted to act cool as if she didn't care and was going to do what she wanted. But then she knew she was an ass wasn't paying attention and deserved the honk, and went ahead and took off.

I wasn't really mad at her, per se...it's just a little ridiculous to block traffic so you can text. And dangerous! So really, my real note to self should be:

4) Don't text and drive.

Which I never do. I rarely text as it is.


5) Consider the environment

Someone sent directions today for my boss. At the end of the text in the Word file, it said:

P Please consider the environment before printing this e-mail

So, I thought about the environment for about 30 seconds, and then I pressed print.

I am all for the environment, and I like the message, but my boss needed the directions in hand, in a file, per his instructions. Boss =1 , Environment = 0. Sorry Environment.

Being Safe Versus Being Right - Drama of the Day

Today, I was behind a minivan at a stoplight. The light turned green, and guy in minivan proceeded to turn veerry slowly. He was on his cell phone so he's allowed, right?

I actually did not care how slowly he turned, as he was turning (slowly) onto a 4-lane road, and I could simply pass him.

So I proceed to the left lane to pass him. As slow as he was going, I am somehow not getting around him. The fucker is speeding up in the right lane. I go faster, he goes faster. I need back in the right lane to make my turn, so I go ahead and get back in the right lane. Yep, I did cut him off.

Apparently, this Cell Phone Talking Mini Van Driving Guy does NOT allow that. He proceeded to tailgate me...very...closely. Dangerously close.

Then he followed me into my work parking garage.

I deliberately picked a space where there were no other open spaces around, so as to avoid a confrontation. I thought, "Surely, this dude isn't actually following me!". Dude certainly was. He stopped right behind my car. This middle-aged, bald dude.

I think, "ok, ok, I'll talk to him about it".

Dude (in a tone that is confrontational but not yelling): "Why are you in such a hurry?"

Me: "You were racing me!"

Dude: "No I wasn't"

Me: "You turned so slowly, so I went to pass you, then you sped up and wouldn't let me around you. Oh, are you on your cell phone? (I spy cell phone) Yes, yes you are"

I walk away with, "Have a nice day".

Dude, "Yeah, whatever".

Me: "God Bless You, Sir".

Dude: (in a sarcastic, pissed manner, and not that I wasn't being sarcastic myself, but for all he knew, I meant it) "Yeah, yeah".

I went back out to the garage about 1/2 hour later to make sure he did not damage my car somehow. I also moved my car to a different spot. I looked for his van, but did not see it. I am pretty sure he was not parking there, but just wanted to confront me.

You know, I'm not saying I was 100% right about cutting him off, but who follows people to their parking spot to say something? Does the guy follow every single person who doesn't drive the way he likes to their parking space? Or am I the first person to piss him off?

I handled it well on the spot, but by the time I got back to my office, I was all hyperventilating and stuff. Yeah, yeah, the fucking drama. I'm not used to being confronted in such a manner; rather thin-skinned am I. I'm glad I held it together in front of dude, though. But, I was able to make myself Drama Queen of the Day by talking about it on FB. :)


IN RETROSPECT:

1) I should have gone straight and taken the next right (not out of my way but by a fraction maybe), OR slowed down and got behind him, although I'm not sure if that was an option. I can't remember the traffic situation - who was behind us, etc. Okay...he was clearly being a dick. He was. He was speeding up while I was passing him, which is illegal. But...I admit that once I had it in my head that I wanted to be in front of him, he wasn't stopping me. When I got in front of him, I was cutting it close. I did have other options. Safe is better than Right. I should have picked a safer option not b/c he was right, but for my own safety. People are nuts. What if something worse would have happened?

2) I should have stayed in my car and not gotten out, and/or called the police. What if he would have had a gun or would have gotten out of his car? Sounds paranoid, but it could happen. I kind of wish I would not have parked and would have driven directly to the campus police station, which was not far. Would he have followed me there? Would that be a waste of the police's time if I were to go there in that situation?

3) I should not have gone back out to my car by myself, when I went to check to make sure there was no damage.

4) And I wonder if I should have taken the higher ground and simply apologized very nicely, even though I was not completely wrong in the matter?


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Hopefully, he has forgotten about this, and isn't going to "track me down" further.

Hopefully, he is not an alumnus (is that correct? Or alumni?) or professor or dean or some other higher up.

Hopefully, he doesn't know anyone I know.

Not because I think I am 100% wrong, but b/c I freaking cannot deal with controversy and confrontation and gossip.

I wanted to tell him I was pregnant and to leave me alone, ha ha.

But seriously, if I was a guy driving some big ol' truck, would he have followed me like that? I have the feeling it was b/c I was a woman. I mean I drive a station wagon with a car seat in the back. It's not like I'm some punk. What a dick!

And I live in a relatively small town. Clearly, I could never deal with NY or LA, admittedly.

Unfortunately, this type of stuff makes me hate People.

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AND NOW THE POSITIVE:

But you know, I reluctantly have to thank this dickless dude. I am going to try harder to get in my driving zone and not give a shit. What I mean is, okay, dude speeds up, clearly trying to beat me, I don't want him to, so I don't let him. Fuck that. It's not worth my life or safety, and of course I always think of Jude (who wasn't with me at the time). Next time, I'll just let the dickless wonders "win" and go on with my safe life. So thank you, Mr. Asshole. You are clearly a Messenger from God.