It actually wasn't that hellish. I just wanted to be melodramatic.
We along with my parents took our son to a semi-local amusement park this past weekend. A good time was had by all. It's weird to go to parks like that mostly for the enjoyment of someone else rather than for my own enjoyment. Not weird, but rather, new...for us. It's actually more fun to see him have fun. I think I'm sort of over roller coasters and carnival games and the like, at least until our son is older and wants to do that stuff.
The drive down was pleasant enough. A perfect day really. We only had to stop 3 times for potty breaks...another downfall to being so "old". Actually, I can blame my parents for this one. :)
We got there about 1/2 hour after it opened, and were very disappointed to see that the parking lot was packed full already. The website said that September was a less crowded time to go. Liars. Unless it is even more crowded in July, and if that is the case, I will NEVER go mid-summer.
So it was packed, and I'm sorry but that is a real drag. Long lines for everything and stupid people everywhere. Plus tons and tons of kids completely and totally out of control and revved up on sugar or high fructose corn syrup, with no parental supervision in sight.
Our poor little son...he's too little to fight his way up the ladder for the kiddie slides in the water park. But don't think we didn't fight for him, cuz we did. We were yelling at and corralling kids all over the place: "don't run!" "wait your turn!", etc. We were really popular among the kids, but I'm sorry, the parents aren't going to do it, I am.
In one part of the park, two boys, I'd put them at 10 years old, were taking huge handfuls of rocks and throwing them at each other across the playground, the kiddie playground I might add, meant for toddlers. We yelled at them, too. :)
And it was a wicked hot day. I forgot that the weather in the southern part of the state can differ greatly from the northern part.
Still, a good time was had by all and our son loved it. The kiddyland rides were not crowded at all. And, we were able to take him down some of the bigger waterslides (not the very big ones, but slightly bigger than the really little kiddy ones). We even caught a "retro" show featuring 60's-80's music. Our son was exhausted by the end.
We would have left him at the hotel with my mom and come back for bigger rides, but Matt was sick and I wasn't going to force him to fight the crowds and heat again. I was tired myself anyway.
The hotel was quaint and inexpensive. The bad thing about the hotel was that there weren't many eating options. The restaurant had a gross buffet, which looked like school cafeteria food. Bleh. So we wanted to get a delivery from this place across the street. The ad said "free delivery", and they had pizza, sandwiches, chicken fingers, etc.
I called.
"Yes, I'd like to order a delivery..."
"uh...we ain't doin' deliveries today. I dunno why."
"uh...okay"
Whatever.
Matt & I discuss it, and decide to call in a carry out. Matt's turn to try.
"Yes, I'd like to order a carry out"
[he places order]
"wouldju like us to jez bring it to yer room?" (??????)
"uh yeah! that'd be great!"
Okay...so I guess they changed their mind about making deliveries then.
They call us back 1/2 hour later:
"we ain't got no fries no more. We're all out. Is onion rings okay?"
"sure, onion rings are fine"
How can they be out of fries? Oh well. I guess it can happen.
And when the order arrives, we get:
1) not only no fries, but no onion rings
2) cheese on the sandwich that Matt ordered without cheese (he is lactose intolerant), and melted cheese, no less, so he could not just pick it off
3) burnt sandwiches to boot
We were too tired and hungry to fight it.
So the eating situation sucked.
But this amusement park is a great place to take the fam. It's very customer service friendly. You get free drinks all day, even water (sounds lame but you know at some places you are forced to buy bottled water for $1-$5 a bottle!), and you get free life jackets for the kiddies and free sunscreen. The water park there is really, really cool.
Next time though, we will try off-season AND a week day.
The drive back was interesting. It rained the whole time, but not badly. The interesting part is that I'm pretty sure my dad was racing us back, or trying damn hard to keep up with me. Well, if it was a race, I won. :) (without breaking the speed limit, btw...I only went 5 over...It was just my expert driving and maneuvering and passing skills....)
btw...I filled up near the hotel when we left Sunday, at $3.86 a gallon. By the time we got home, it was $4.15 a gallon. The hell?
Thursday, September 18, 2008
Monday, September 15, 2008
Note to the girl behind me at the checkout...
"Do not put your checkout items on the conveyor belt until the person in front of you has put all of their items on the conveyor belt first. See, what happens is that the conveyor belt moves forward, hence bringing all of your stuff down to my end, and making the space I have left to put the rest of my items on small to non-existent."
I wanted to bitch slap that gal behind me.
I was about to make a remark of sorts, but noticed how young she was and chalked it up to inexperience. I mean, you don't learn this important lesson in life until you live it. Sure, logic should tell you so, but sometimes we get distracted and logic disappears. And, she was trying to carry like 20 items. More inexperience there. Next time, she will know to grab a cart and to wait to load her stuff.
And by young, I mean high school young. So I'm glad I didn't yell at her. I only had a couple of more items anyway, so I just handed them to the checker. Had I had a crap load of stuff like I usually do, I would have been forced to do something, like throw all her stuff on the floor.
Further, one doesn't want to go around yelling at people and making snide remarks to strangers (I mean one *wants* to, but we should play nice). You never know what people are going through in their personal lives. Good thing Matt wasn't with me. He enjoys yelling at stupid people.
Footnote: I got a book for Jude and he knows to put the items on the belt before we can take it home. So, he promptly put it in her section, b/c he didn't have much choice. I should have let her pay for it. That would have showed her.
;-)
I wanted to bitch slap that gal behind me.
I was about to make a remark of sorts, but noticed how young she was and chalked it up to inexperience. I mean, you don't learn this important lesson in life until you live it. Sure, logic should tell you so, but sometimes we get distracted and logic disappears. And, she was trying to carry like 20 items. More inexperience there. Next time, she will know to grab a cart and to wait to load her stuff.
And by young, I mean high school young. So I'm glad I didn't yell at her. I only had a couple of more items anyway, so I just handed them to the checker. Had I had a crap load of stuff like I usually do, I would have been forced to do something, like throw all her stuff on the floor.
Further, one doesn't want to go around yelling at people and making snide remarks to strangers (I mean one *wants* to, but we should play nice). You never know what people are going through in their personal lives. Good thing Matt wasn't with me. He enjoys yelling at stupid people.
Footnote: I got a book for Jude and he knows to put the items on the belt before we can take it home. So, he promptly put it in her section, b/c he didn't have much choice. I should have let her pay for it. That would have showed her.
;-)
Tuesday, September 09, 2008
Wild and Crazy Tailgating Party
Ha ha! That title is a sarcastic joke.
For the most uptight people you'll ever meet, Matt & I are the most laid back people you'll ever meet. And that makes..no...sense.
We went to the season opener for football (of course) Saturday. We decided to tailgate. Our idea of tailgating is to avoid the crowds and have our own, private little tailgate. Which I guess that right there shows our uptightness.
It's not the people really...it's just that I think you have to pay now to tailgate in the designated tailgate areas. And..you have to park your car there the night before or really early and the whole thing just sounds like a hassle. *uptight!!!*
So we just hang out at a nearby park, heh.
We had the parking lot to ourselves mostly. We go back in the back...not in the more popular lots of the park. We kicked back, had some cocktails, and enjoyed the scenery. It was nice! I felt like we were being bad for having cocktails out in the open like that. That certainly shows my age!
We did meet one person though...heh. As the car pulled up, I thought we would have a fellow tailgater and so would not be complete losers. We talked for a while, and he was a really nice man and said he had been going to these football games since 1962 (!!!). Turns out though he was just waiting for his wife to meet him there and then they were going over to the cooler places to tailgate. Ha ha!
No story would be complete without hijinks and mishaps!
THE HIJINKS AND MISHAPS OF MATT AND KARLA'S TAILGATING PARTY:
1) I forgot our lunch. Damn it! I hate it when I do that. The sandwiches were still in the fridge at home, although we did have chips and Oreos and apples. We were forced to drink more Jack Daniels for the lack of food. It was terrible.
2) So with all that Jack, I had to tinkle. I knew I wouldn't make it to the stadium (old age again), so sadly, I was forced to take the Mother Nature route, i.e....use the woods. Bleh...there are so many reasons I hate doing that...
Anyway, I make it out there okay, find a good spot, do my business without getting caught (one of my fears), etc. On my way back to the car though, like an idiot, instead of going around this giant plant I came upon, I leap over it instead, like I'm in The Matrix or something. The hell??
The price I paid for not actually being in The Matrix is that I ended up covered from head to toe in those cockleburs or whatever they're called...those sticky little green seed things (not the huge brown thorny kind, but just as bad). Completely covered. And Matt & I spent the next 15 minutes or so picking them off of me. I felt like the dog.
I should have got a picture of that, but I didn't. I do have a couple of other pics though that I'll post later.
On the way there, we passed a parking lot that I think will be a better place to tailgate next time. Not in the middle of all the ruckus, but not quite so isolated. See you there! (Homecoming is the next game we're going to)
For the most uptight people you'll ever meet, Matt & I are the most laid back people you'll ever meet. And that makes..no...sense.
We went to the season opener for football (of course) Saturday. We decided to tailgate. Our idea of tailgating is to avoid the crowds and have our own, private little tailgate. Which I guess that right there shows our uptightness.
It's not the people really...it's just that I think you have to pay now to tailgate in the designated tailgate areas. And..you have to park your car there the night before or really early and the whole thing just sounds like a hassle. *uptight!!!*
So we just hang out at a nearby park, heh.
We had the parking lot to ourselves mostly. We go back in the back...not in the more popular lots of the park. We kicked back, had some cocktails, and enjoyed the scenery. It was nice! I felt like we were being bad for having cocktails out in the open like that. That certainly shows my age!
We did meet one person though...heh. As the car pulled up, I thought we would have a fellow tailgater and so would not be complete losers. We talked for a while, and he was a really nice man and said he had been going to these football games since 1962 (!!!). Turns out though he was just waiting for his wife to meet him there and then they were going over to the cooler places to tailgate. Ha ha!
No story would be complete without hijinks and mishaps!
THE HIJINKS AND MISHAPS OF MATT AND KARLA'S TAILGATING PARTY:
1) I forgot our lunch. Damn it! I hate it when I do that. The sandwiches were still in the fridge at home, although we did have chips and Oreos and apples. We were forced to drink more Jack Daniels for the lack of food. It was terrible.
2) So with all that Jack, I had to tinkle. I knew I wouldn't make it to the stadium (old age again), so sadly, I was forced to take the Mother Nature route, i.e....use the woods. Bleh...there are so many reasons I hate doing that...
Anyway, I make it out there okay, find a good spot, do my business without getting caught (one of my fears), etc. On my way back to the car though, like an idiot, instead of going around this giant plant I came upon, I leap over it instead, like I'm in The Matrix or something. The hell??
The price I paid for not actually being in The Matrix is that I ended up covered from head to toe in those cockleburs or whatever they're called...those sticky little green seed things (not the huge brown thorny kind, but just as bad). Completely covered. And Matt & I spent the next 15 minutes or so picking them off of me. I felt like the dog.
I should have got a picture of that, but I didn't. I do have a couple of other pics though that I'll post later.
On the way there, we passed a parking lot that I think will be a better place to tailgate next time. Not in the middle of all the ruckus, but not quite so isolated. See you there! (Homecoming is the next game we're going to)
I guess it's all a matter of perspective...
So, with regards to my last post....I was complaining/venting about someone. I have since deleted the post due to what I think should or should not be put out for public viewing for all eternity. So if you read that last post before I deleted it, this will make sense. If not....well, it might be fun to read anyway.
In my meditative drive to work, I realized something....the very thing I was complaining about this person doing....I'm pretty sure I do the same thing to Matt quite frequently. Now that I am aware of this issue I have with someone else, I am aware of myself doing it. Huh.
This is insightful for 2 reasons:
1) It is insightful in the sense that I wonder how Matt feels about this. He is getting this from 2 different directions. I am sure he does not appreciate it anymore than I do. It makes me want to quit doing it, just b/c I know how it feels when it's done to me. I think *I myself* will stifle. Funny how it's easy enough to criticize someone else when you have your own dang problems you should fix first!
2) It is also insightful b/c now I see it more from her perspective, knowing how I feel when I do it to Matt. I am not in fact trying to be mean or bossy or pushy or meddling when I do that to Matt. In my mind, I am being helpful. Truly and sincerely, I think I am helping. Now I am almost 100% sure that that is what she is thinking, too. And I am almost 100% sure that it is equally annoying to Matt when I do it to him.
So what to do now? Does this mean I back off on her totally just b/c I understand better? Understanding is important. I think most of the things I mentioned her doing were no big deal in the grand scheme of life. The shoe thing was the worst, and I think Janel was right...that I handled it fine...and I in fact did not let her get her way. I just need to work on not dwelling on it after the fact.
Although she is trying to be helpful, I think it is within my rights to tell her that she is not in fact being so helpful, and to tell her how I feel about things. However, I think it will be easier for me to do it more nicely now.
As far as Matt, I will definitely back off and let him take the reigns when he wants to. Weird...that urge to meddle and "help"...
Now I need to decide if I should share this revelation with Matt. It's not about pride (mostly not). It's more that I have a bad habit of talking the talk, but not walking the walk. So I can analyze a subject into the ground and talk about how smart I am now and how great I am going to be...but not actually *do* anything about it. I want the actions to speak for themselves.
And this is such a strange HABIT of mine...I am going to have to forcibly stop myself from interfering when I see Matt put shorts on Jude that I wouldn't have put on him, for instance. I can do it though. But again, enough talk. Let's just do it.
I'll update in a few weeks. :)
In my meditative drive to work, I realized something....the very thing I was complaining about this person doing....I'm pretty sure I do the same thing to Matt quite frequently. Now that I am aware of this issue I have with someone else, I am aware of myself doing it. Huh.
This is insightful for 2 reasons:
1) It is insightful in the sense that I wonder how Matt feels about this. He is getting this from 2 different directions. I am sure he does not appreciate it anymore than I do. It makes me want to quit doing it, just b/c I know how it feels when it's done to me. I think *I myself* will stifle. Funny how it's easy enough to criticize someone else when you have your own dang problems you should fix first!
2) It is also insightful b/c now I see it more from her perspective, knowing how I feel when I do it to Matt. I am not in fact trying to be mean or bossy or pushy or meddling when I do that to Matt. In my mind, I am being helpful. Truly and sincerely, I think I am helping. Now I am almost 100% sure that that is what she is thinking, too. And I am almost 100% sure that it is equally annoying to Matt when I do it to him.
So what to do now? Does this mean I back off on her totally just b/c I understand better? Understanding is important. I think most of the things I mentioned her doing were no big deal in the grand scheme of life. The shoe thing was the worst, and I think Janel was right...that I handled it fine...and I in fact did not let her get her way. I just need to work on not dwelling on it after the fact.
Although she is trying to be helpful, I think it is within my rights to tell her that she is not in fact being so helpful, and to tell her how I feel about things. However, I think it will be easier for me to do it more nicely now.
As far as Matt, I will definitely back off and let him take the reigns when he wants to. Weird...that urge to meddle and "help"...
Now I need to decide if I should share this revelation with Matt. It's not about pride (mostly not). It's more that I have a bad habit of talking the talk, but not walking the walk. So I can analyze a subject into the ground and talk about how smart I am now and how great I am going to be...but not actually *do* anything about it. I want the actions to speak for themselves.
And this is such a strange HABIT of mine...I am going to have to forcibly stop myself from interfering when I see Matt put shorts on Jude that I wouldn't have put on him, for instance. I can do it though. But again, enough talk. Let's just do it.
I'll update in a few weeks. :)
Wednesday, September 03, 2008
*I* Am The Mother - DELETED!
This is the type of post I will more than likely delete later....
==============================================================
And as predicted, I deleted it. I have talked with Matt a lot about it, which simply talking helps, and it helps that he is on my side, of course. There are many things I love about her and many, many positives. This is nothing I can't handle, but still, it doesn't have to be ignored either. I think if I communicate properly next time, everything will work out. I'll let you know.
Thank you for your comments.
TG - I do understand that we will always be "the kids", and being a parent myself now, I understand that concept even more than before. I also respect the fact that she is a very strong woman...
Janel - Thank you. That's what it is - "annoying" - and it's not the end of the world. Although I don't act out in her presence, I do need to find better ways to handle it. It shouldn't eat at me like that.
As far as both of the people in my story, I have to realize that they both have their own set of issues and there are reasons they do this. They both feel insecure for different reasons, and I understand why. They shouldn't feel insecure, but sometimes, one can't help it when put in certain situations (one having to do with proximity and relation, and the other having to do with marital status and general loneliness and depression).
So...there you go. I am as understanding as freaking ever. :)
==============================================================
And as predicted, I deleted it. I have talked with Matt a lot about it, which simply talking helps, and it helps that he is on my side, of course. There are many things I love about her and many, many positives. This is nothing I can't handle, but still, it doesn't have to be ignored either. I think if I communicate properly next time, everything will work out. I'll let you know.
Thank you for your comments.
TG - I do understand that we will always be "the kids", and being a parent myself now, I understand that concept even more than before. I also respect the fact that she is a very strong woman...
Janel - Thank you. That's what it is - "annoying" - and it's not the end of the world. Although I don't act out in her presence, I do need to find better ways to handle it. It shouldn't eat at me like that.
As far as both of the people in my story, I have to realize that they both have their own set of issues and there are reasons they do this. They both feel insecure for different reasons, and I understand why. They shouldn't feel insecure, but sometimes, one can't help it when put in certain situations (one having to do with proximity and relation, and the other having to do with marital status and general loneliness and depression).
So...there you go. I am as understanding as freaking ever. :)
Tuesday, September 02, 2008
Stressed out...
The things that are stressing me out lately, in no particular order (elaborations to follow):
1) My son's switch to a new daycare.
2) My mother-in-law.
3) Having to get special permission simply to take a shower.
4) Feeling guilty for wanting some "me" time.
5) Not wanting anyone to get sick and not wanting anyone to die. Ever.
6) Worrying about being the best mother, wife, and person that I can be.
7) Not having enough time for, well, anything.
8) Various household tasks that I just cannot get done.
9) Worries about my friend situation.
10) Worries about what I want in life, why I'm here on the internet, and what I should alter.
Whew...that's a lot! I'm letting it all get to me. I'm not sure why. I am allowing myself to feel these things though, and to realize that I will get stressed out sometimes, and it's okay to not ALWAYS be cheerful and upbeat, and to sometimes feel stress.
The thing is, I'm okay throughout the day, simply b/c I am so busy I don't have time to think about it. But, last night for instance, I just could...not...sleep. I just lay there, worrying, crying, upset, worrying, not sleeping. My thoughts were driving me mad.
and I know my life is great and I am very happy and couldn't ask for more. So I don't know why I'm stressing. I think it's the accumulation of it all. If only it were one thing at a time, I could handle it better, I think.
I'm tired today and have a headache and my jaw hurts. It does that when I let stress get to me b/c I clench my jaw a lot.
I don't have feelings of anger. Mostly of anxiety and angst and worry.
It's going to be too long of a post if I write it out here. So, I'm going to break it down in separate posts, I think. More to come.
1) My son's switch to a new daycare.
2) My mother-in-law.
3) Having to get special permission simply to take a shower.
4) Feeling guilty for wanting some "me" time.
5) Not wanting anyone to get sick and not wanting anyone to die. Ever.
6) Worrying about being the best mother, wife, and person that I can be.
7) Not having enough time for, well, anything.
8) Various household tasks that I just cannot get done.
9) Worries about my friend situation.
10) Worries about what I want in life, why I'm here on the internet, and what I should alter.
Whew...that's a lot! I'm letting it all get to me. I'm not sure why. I am allowing myself to feel these things though, and to realize that I will get stressed out sometimes, and it's okay to not ALWAYS be cheerful and upbeat, and to sometimes feel stress.
The thing is, I'm okay throughout the day, simply b/c I am so busy I don't have time to think about it. But, last night for instance, I just could...not...sleep. I just lay there, worrying, crying, upset, worrying, not sleeping. My thoughts were driving me mad.
and I know my life is great and I am very happy and couldn't ask for more. So I don't know why I'm stressing. I think it's the accumulation of it all. If only it were one thing at a time, I could handle it better, I think.
I'm tired today and have a headache and my jaw hurts. It does that when I let stress get to me b/c I clench my jaw a lot.
I don't have feelings of anger. Mostly of anxiety and angst and worry.
It's going to be too long of a post if I write it out here. So, I'm going to break it down in separate posts, I think. More to come.
Monday, August 04, 2008
July Mini-Vacation recap (long overdue recap, that is)
Unlike my usual fare, I am going to write about normal, every day, life stuff, like most normal people do.
It's hotter than a mofo here. Just sayin'. Now back to the main idea of the story.
I wanted to talk about the mini-vacay hubby and I took, without the kidlet. It was fun, for the most part. We got along with each other fine, just some crummy stuff happened along the way. But the good stuff first.
The funnest part (for us) about Lake Michigan trips is visiting the wineries. So we had a good time doing that. Bought about, oh, 15-20 bottles of wine (we gave some of them away). We went to 5 wineries...probably one too many. We stopped at a small town before the 5th winery to eat at a local place (we like to go local places and not to chains when on vacation), and we stuffed ourselves silly. Some good eats. But then we were so full, that no wine after that was going to taste good. I felt sick, in fact.
Now the bad stuff. We didn't even get out of Indiana b4 getting a speeding ticket. That, of course, royally sucked. Matt hasn't gotten one in like 20 years. I've never gotten one. Our luck ran out I guess. It sucked b/c we weren't even speeding on purpose, you know? Sounds lame, but sometimes, at least the way M & I are, we know full well we are going way too fast. But this time, we were just trying to find the blasted exit. We were on the highway, and neither one of us knew the speed limit had lowered to 45, and neither of us knew how fast Matt was going. It didn't even feel fast...like when M drives erratically, I make him slow down. But it felt normal, we were with the flow of traffic, etc. Felt fine, except 20 over the limit. Oops...can't really make excuses to the cop, ya know? Ya just take it. $134 down the drain.
Then once we got to Grand Haven, fuck! It was like Chicago traffic. Not just the traffic jam itself, but people were being complete assholes. I mean really mean! We complain about drivers here...but this is nothing. People here are relatively nice. The first thing that happened was that Matt changed lanes and got ahead of a truck. Not on purpose or anything...we were barely paying attention to that truck. But somehow, we pissed the guy in the truck off, and he went over on THE SHOULDER on the right to go around all the traffic on the other side and get in front of us again. But we were still ahead. Later down the road when they ended up passing us, the passenger (girlfriend/wife, whatever) flipped us off! WTF?
We actually stayed in Muskegon, but it was like that there, too. Every once in a while here, you'll encounter a mean asshole driver, and you tell your story to whoever will listen, then you move on. There, it was every day, every time we drove somewhere. Sucked.
We blame everyone' s anger on this u-turn system they have there. At stoplights, they won't let you take a left on to the highway. Instead, you take a right, then make a u-turn, which forces all kinds of merging into traffic and therefore all kinds of problems.
Other than all that, it was nice to get away. We ate at some good restaurants and saw the lake so that was all fun. I doubt we'd go there again. I liked South Haven better. I want to do Mackinaw Island next.
So after eating crap for 4-5 days straight, plus drinking, no working out, little water...I felt like crap. I gained 5 pounds! But other than how I look, what really bothers me is how I felt. Crappy, and my g/i system was totally fucked up. So, I've been working on fixing all that since then.
I never thought I'd actually crave healthy food instead of the deep-fried yucky crap I was eating. I let myself play on vacation, so I don't feel bad about it, but I really had to get back to healthy stuff. Plus, this vacation wasn't like our typical vacations where we do a lot of walking or biking. We mostly vegged. It was nice for a change, but damn, do I feel the difference.
It's hotter than a mofo here. Just sayin'. Now back to the main idea of the story.
I wanted to talk about the mini-vacay hubby and I took, without the kidlet. It was fun, for the most part. We got along with each other fine, just some crummy stuff happened along the way. But the good stuff first.
The funnest part (for us) about Lake Michigan trips is visiting the wineries. So we had a good time doing that. Bought about, oh, 15-20 bottles of wine (we gave some of them away). We went to 5 wineries...probably one too many. We stopped at a small town before the 5th winery to eat at a local place (we like to go local places and not to chains when on vacation), and we stuffed ourselves silly. Some good eats. But then we were so full, that no wine after that was going to taste good. I felt sick, in fact.
Now the bad stuff. We didn't even get out of Indiana b4 getting a speeding ticket. That, of course, royally sucked. Matt hasn't gotten one in like 20 years. I've never gotten one. Our luck ran out I guess. It sucked b/c we weren't even speeding on purpose, you know? Sounds lame, but sometimes, at least the way M & I are, we know full well we are going way too fast. But this time, we were just trying to find the blasted exit. We were on the highway, and neither one of us knew the speed limit had lowered to 45, and neither of us knew how fast Matt was going. It didn't even feel fast...like when M drives erratically, I make him slow down. But it felt normal, we were with the flow of traffic, etc. Felt fine, except 20 over the limit. Oops...can't really make excuses to the cop, ya know? Ya just take it. $134 down the drain.
Then once we got to Grand Haven, fuck! It was like Chicago traffic. Not just the traffic jam itself, but people were being complete assholes. I mean really mean! We complain about drivers here...but this is nothing. People here are relatively nice. The first thing that happened was that Matt changed lanes and got ahead of a truck. Not on purpose or anything...we were barely paying attention to that truck. But somehow, we pissed the guy in the truck off, and he went over on THE SHOULDER on the right to go around all the traffic on the other side and get in front of us again. But we were still ahead. Later down the road when they ended up passing us, the passenger (girlfriend/wife, whatever) flipped us off! WTF?
We actually stayed in Muskegon, but it was like that there, too. Every once in a while here, you'll encounter a mean asshole driver, and you tell your story to whoever will listen, then you move on. There, it was every day, every time we drove somewhere. Sucked.
We blame everyone' s anger on this u-turn system they have there. At stoplights, they won't let you take a left on to the highway. Instead, you take a right, then make a u-turn, which forces all kinds of merging into traffic and therefore all kinds of problems.
Other than all that, it was nice to get away. We ate at some good restaurants and saw the lake so that was all fun. I doubt we'd go there again. I liked South Haven better. I want to do Mackinaw Island next.
So after eating crap for 4-5 days straight, plus drinking, no working out, little water...I felt like crap. I gained 5 pounds! But other than how I look, what really bothers me is how I felt. Crappy, and my g/i system was totally fucked up. So, I've been working on fixing all that since then.
I never thought I'd actually crave healthy food instead of the deep-fried yucky crap I was eating. I let myself play on vacation, so I don't feel bad about it, but I really had to get back to healthy stuff. Plus, this vacation wasn't like our typical vacations where we do a lot of walking or biking. We mostly vegged. It was nice for a change, but damn, do I feel the difference.
Monday, July 28, 2008
Breakage
We all do it. I think. Breaks are needed. Too much freaking time on the internet! Causes me to lose focus on lots of things. I've been taking a break to refocus and take care of business, but I'll be back. As always, I have things to say. :)
Thursday, June 19, 2008
Cold and Freakishly Depressing Mountain
SPOILER ALERT: IF YOU HAVEN'T SEEN OR READ COLD MOUNTAIN, I WOULD ADVISE AGAINST READING THIS. ALSO, PLEASE DON'T SPOIL THE MOVIE FOR ME, AS I'VE ONLY READ THE BOOK SO FAR.
******************************************************************************
I finished the book Cold Mountain a while back. [I am almost always several years behind in reading books on the best-sellers lists. I knew I wanted to read this book before I saw the movie though (several years behind on movies, as well). I can't stand seeing a movie and THEN reading the book, b/c I cannot get the images from the movie, images imagined and created by someone else, out of my head. And not that writers and directors don't do a fine job of bringing a best-seller to life in film. I just prefer to conjure up my own images.]
Anyway...I didn't know much about CM other than it was about the Civil War. And long lost love.
I swear to G, every freaking chapter ended with either someone dying, or with an animal dying. More often than not, it was an animal dying.
Most often, it was out of necessity. CM dude was a rebel army deserter (sounds yellow, but makes more sense if you understand the history of the civil war and how things were for the south at the end of it. I did not begrudge his being a deserter). He was "walking" his way back to Cold Mountain of the Appalachians, and had to kill animals to survive. Understandable. Still, I'd rather not hear the gory details of it all.
Even if you can forgive the "killing animals for food" theme, there are plenty of animals that die for no good reason. Like mother bears accidentally diving off the side of cliffs, leaving baby bears behind. And then CM dude thinking that he could take baby bear as a pet, and getting all sentimental about it before shooting baby bear in the head.
Or goat mountain woman having many goats for pets, which she used to live off of, which is all fair and good. But they describe it something like this (paraphrased):
And a goat walked up to goat woman and starting nudging her, and she stroked it's beard and scratched it's ear (all content like it was a pet cat or something), before she breaks its neck or stabs it or whatever so she can eat it.
And all kinds of turkeys and horses and other animals are killed, too.
The book as whole was depressing. Every chapter ended for me in a bad way. The first time someone or something died, I was upset and cried like I would in any other book as it usually only happens once or twice in books I read. But as every chapter ended like that, I kinda got used to it. By the later chapters, I could tell what the end of the chapters were going to come to, and I'd think, "well...here we go again" and then, "great! another animal/person was killed. Great!"..close the book...go to sleep...a disturbed sleep.
There is no way a book like that can end on a good note. And the f-er tricks you into thinking it will end on a good note, and it doesn't.
So you think CM dude is killed in the end, but you don't know for sure. At that point I thought, knowing this author and the way things have gone thus far, he had to have died.
The beginning of the next chapter leads you to believe he's alive for a second. I thought this about the author:...aw...what a softie. After all that darkness, he brings us a good ending after all. Aw.
But in fact, he was talking about someone else. He wants you to THINK he's talking about CM dude (whose name is Inman), but really, he was talking about someone else. At that point, I thought, "that f'er. I KNEW he'd have to make this a bad and depressing ending" Sure, the leading gal Ada ended up having his kid, after his death, but so what.
But the darkness makes sense, too. The American Civil War was not a cheery, upbeat time, as no war really is. It's a horrible place to be...both for the people fighting in the war, and for the people at home waiting for them, and for society. The book was very well written and very well representative of the time. I did not expect it to be a happy-go-lucky story, or that it should have been called Warm Fuzzy Mountain....although I did think it was going to be more of a love story and that they'd end up together. I also could have understood the darkness of war without hearing about all the animal killings.
Overall, although it was a good book, it's just not my preferred genre. Now, I don't necessarily like only upbeat books....but I don't know...survival and depression and animal slaughtering are just not things I like to read about on a regular basis.
Another thing was that I could not identify with Ada at all. I just didn't like her character, or at least I didn't understand her, or on the most basic level, did not see much of myself in her. That didn't make her a bad character, but I do like books where I can understand and relate to the main character, or see some of myself in them. I know it's selfish and narrow-minded, but it's not really. There are many fictional characters I enjoy reading about who are nothing like me, yet I understand them, or I see a little of myself in them. I saw little of myself in Ada.
I will still watch the movie though, as it will be interesting to see how well the movie follows the book, or how they butcher the book, as is usually what happens in movies, both out of necessity and out of a need to please the public. I wonder if they'll have him die in the end (please don't tell me). I did hear that they did in fact focus more on the Hollywood-type and expected type of love in this movie than they did in the book.
Knowing what I already knew about the movie, I unfortunately could not help but think of Jude Law and Nicole Kidman while reading the novel. Without having seen the movie, I would say that Jude Law was a good match for the role (of course, I am a fan of his...), as well as Natalie Portman (fan of hers, too, and yes I've seen Closer). Renee Zelweger (fan), too, although I had originally pictured Renee's character as a black woman for some reason..but once I figured out that it was the character that Renee played, I can see it.
I did not imagine the character that Phillip Seymore Hoffmann played looking like him, but I didn't have a good grasp of what that character looked like while I was reading, so I can now see PSH being good in that role. Donald Sutherland is sufficient as Ada's father, but I think any patriarchal character actor could have filled that role. Can totally see Giovanni Ribisi playing Junior...I think he'll be damn good as that.
It's Nicole Kidman that I don't like as this character. She doesn't seem right for this role, and I'm tired of her taking all the good roles just b/c she is Nicole Kidman. I am very picky about accents, and if I detect an inkling of an Australian accent, I won't like it.
Still, I can't judge it until I see it. Nicole Kidman is an excellent actress, as much as I criticize, and quite frankly, she had me at To Die For. She's one of those ultra famous ones that I really don't want to like, but that I secretly do like.
I'll update once I see the movie.
******************************************************************************
I finished the book Cold Mountain a while back. [I am almost always several years behind in reading books on the best-sellers lists. I knew I wanted to read this book before I saw the movie though (several years behind on movies, as well). I can't stand seeing a movie and THEN reading the book, b/c I cannot get the images from the movie, images imagined and created by someone else, out of my head. And not that writers and directors don't do a fine job of bringing a best-seller to life in film. I just prefer to conjure up my own images.]
Anyway...I didn't know much about CM other than it was about the Civil War. And long lost love.
I swear to G, every freaking chapter ended with either someone dying, or with an animal dying. More often than not, it was an animal dying.
Most often, it was out of necessity. CM dude was a rebel army deserter (sounds yellow, but makes more sense if you understand the history of the civil war and how things were for the south at the end of it. I did not begrudge his being a deserter). He was "walking" his way back to Cold Mountain of the Appalachians, and had to kill animals to survive. Understandable. Still, I'd rather not hear the gory details of it all.
Even if you can forgive the "killing animals for food" theme, there are plenty of animals that die for no good reason. Like mother bears accidentally diving off the side of cliffs, leaving baby bears behind. And then CM dude thinking that he could take baby bear as a pet, and getting all sentimental about it before shooting baby bear in the head.
Or goat mountain woman having many goats for pets, which she used to live off of, which is all fair and good. But they describe it something like this (paraphrased):
And a goat walked up to goat woman and starting nudging her, and she stroked it's beard and scratched it's ear (all content like it was a pet cat or something), before she breaks its neck or stabs it or whatever so she can eat it.
And all kinds of turkeys and horses and other animals are killed, too.
The book as whole was depressing. Every chapter ended for me in a bad way. The first time someone or something died, I was upset and cried like I would in any other book as it usually only happens once or twice in books I read. But as every chapter ended like that, I kinda got used to it. By the later chapters, I could tell what the end of the chapters were going to come to, and I'd think, "well...here we go again" and then, "great! another animal/person was killed. Great!"..close the book...go to sleep...a disturbed sleep.
There is no way a book like that can end on a good note. And the f-er tricks you into thinking it will end on a good note, and it doesn't.
So you think CM dude is killed in the end, but you don't know for sure. At that point I thought, knowing this author and the way things have gone thus far, he had to have died.
The beginning of the next chapter leads you to believe he's alive for a second. I thought this about the author:...aw...what a softie. After all that darkness, he brings us a good ending after all. Aw.
But in fact, he was talking about someone else. He wants you to THINK he's talking about CM dude (whose name is Inman), but really, he was talking about someone else. At that point, I thought, "that f'er. I KNEW he'd have to make this a bad and depressing ending" Sure, the leading gal Ada ended up having his kid, after his death, but so what.
But the darkness makes sense, too. The American Civil War was not a cheery, upbeat time, as no war really is. It's a horrible place to be...both for the people fighting in the war, and for the people at home waiting for them, and for society. The book was very well written and very well representative of the time. I did not expect it to be a happy-go-lucky story, or that it should have been called Warm Fuzzy Mountain....although I did think it was going to be more of a love story and that they'd end up together. I also could have understood the darkness of war without hearing about all the animal killings.
Overall, although it was a good book, it's just not my preferred genre. Now, I don't necessarily like only upbeat books....but I don't know...survival and depression and animal slaughtering are just not things I like to read about on a regular basis.
Another thing was that I could not identify with Ada at all. I just didn't like her character, or at least I didn't understand her, or on the most basic level, did not see much of myself in her. That didn't make her a bad character, but I do like books where I can understand and relate to the main character, or see some of myself in them. I know it's selfish and narrow-minded, but it's not really. There are many fictional characters I enjoy reading about who are nothing like me, yet I understand them, or I see a little of myself in them. I saw little of myself in Ada.
I will still watch the movie though, as it will be interesting to see how well the movie follows the book, or how they butcher the book, as is usually what happens in movies, both out of necessity and out of a need to please the public. I wonder if they'll have him die in the end (please don't tell me). I did hear that they did in fact focus more on the Hollywood-type and expected type of love in this movie than they did in the book.
Knowing what I already knew about the movie, I unfortunately could not help but think of Jude Law and Nicole Kidman while reading the novel. Without having seen the movie, I would say that Jude Law was a good match for the role (of course, I am a fan of his...), as well as Natalie Portman (fan of hers, too, and yes I've seen Closer). Renee Zelweger (fan), too, although I had originally pictured Renee's character as a black woman for some reason..but once I figured out that it was the character that Renee played, I can see it.
I did not imagine the character that Phillip Seymore Hoffmann played looking like him, but I didn't have a good grasp of what that character looked like while I was reading, so I can now see PSH being good in that role. Donald Sutherland is sufficient as Ada's father, but I think any patriarchal character actor could have filled that role. Can totally see Giovanni Ribisi playing Junior...I think he'll be damn good as that.
It's Nicole Kidman that I don't like as this character. She doesn't seem right for this role, and I'm tired of her taking all the good roles just b/c she is Nicole Kidman. I am very picky about accents, and if I detect an inkling of an Australian accent, I won't like it.
Still, I can't judge it until I see it. Nicole Kidman is an excellent actress, as much as I criticize, and quite frankly, she had me at To Die For. She's one of those ultra famous ones that I really don't want to like, but that I secretly do like.
I'll update once I see the movie.
Monday, June 16, 2008
Back In The Zone
I'm back in my zone again, fitness-wise.
I'm not sure what gets me there and what doesn't exactly...but I do know that it's a mental thing - a state of mind, if you will. Yes, it's whether you want it or don't want it, sure. But how *that* gets in my brain (I wanna do it, I don't wanna do it), I'm not entirely sure. All I know is, if I don't feel like working out, it isn't going to happen.
Being in the zone means I've been working out every day, and liking it. It takes a few weeks to realize I'm back in it. You can't work out ONE day and then say "I'm feeling it. I'm back in." Nope...you won't know for a few weeks.
I know a big part of it for me is simply the time of year. As the summer months approach, it gets warmer, and stays light out longer...more conducive for me as far as wanting to move my body. I have written before that in the winter I want to hibernate - I want to sleep more, and cuddle up in bed, and eat more. But in the summer, I feel like I always want to be on the go.
I have decided to go with it this time...my normal states of mind. Since I feel like working out in the summer, I don't think I'll take breaks from it. I typically break between challenges. But why do that if I feel like I want to keep going?
Plus, I'm not taking many free days from working out. I'm just going to go for it every day, and if I miss a day here or there, no big deal, b/c I'm working out every day anyway. Like today, I could not work out this morning due to unforeseen dog issues. That's okay, b/c I haven't missed a day of working out in 3 weeks. More than likely, I will walk tonight anyway. Although I'm not currently counting that as an official workout, at least I won't be totally sedentary.
Likewise, I'm going to go with how I feel in winter months. When the time comes, I am only going to plan for 3-4 workouts a week, and probably something different than my usual weight training and HIIT - probably yoga and Pilates. It may sound lame to only work out 3 times a week, but it is better than nothing, and I have been known to go through long stretches of nothing in the winter. If I only need to do 3 or 4 a week, that is less pressure on myself, and will more than likely be ready to go back to 6-7 a week in the spring. Taking a break in the winter will prevent a burnout, as I am doing this for the rest of my life.
I am also not going to try to do it through the holidays like I did last year. F that. It's no fun, and pretty much not doable, and not what the holidays are about for me. Thanksgiving and Christmas will be free weeks. Yes, I said WEEKS.
It takes a while to know yourself, and I've learned that this is what Myself wants and what will work for me.
Getting back to my current zone, I think another reason I'm in it is just b/c I'm continuing to figure out how to work things inti my schedule, with the baby and all. I'm figuring out what I can and cannot reasonably accomplish in a day.
I'm not sure what gets me there and what doesn't exactly...but I do know that it's a mental thing - a state of mind, if you will. Yes, it's whether you want it or don't want it, sure. But how *that* gets in my brain (I wanna do it, I don't wanna do it), I'm not entirely sure. All I know is, if I don't feel like working out, it isn't going to happen.
Being in the zone means I've been working out every day, and liking it. It takes a few weeks to realize I'm back in it. You can't work out ONE day and then say "I'm feeling it. I'm back in." Nope...you won't know for a few weeks.
I know a big part of it for me is simply the time of year. As the summer months approach, it gets warmer, and stays light out longer...more conducive for me as far as wanting to move my body. I have written before that in the winter I want to hibernate - I want to sleep more, and cuddle up in bed, and eat more. But in the summer, I feel like I always want to be on the go.
I have decided to go with it this time...my normal states of mind. Since I feel like working out in the summer, I don't think I'll take breaks from it. I typically break between challenges. But why do that if I feel like I want to keep going?
Plus, I'm not taking many free days from working out. I'm just going to go for it every day, and if I miss a day here or there, no big deal, b/c I'm working out every day anyway. Like today, I could not work out this morning due to unforeseen dog issues. That's okay, b/c I haven't missed a day of working out in 3 weeks. More than likely, I will walk tonight anyway. Although I'm not currently counting that as an official workout, at least I won't be totally sedentary.
Likewise, I'm going to go with how I feel in winter months. When the time comes, I am only going to plan for 3-4 workouts a week, and probably something different than my usual weight training and HIIT - probably yoga and Pilates. It may sound lame to only work out 3 times a week, but it is better than nothing, and I have been known to go through long stretches of nothing in the winter. If I only need to do 3 or 4 a week, that is less pressure on myself, and will more than likely be ready to go back to 6-7 a week in the spring. Taking a break in the winter will prevent a burnout, as I am doing this for the rest of my life.
I am also not going to try to do it through the holidays like I did last year. F that. It's no fun, and pretty much not doable, and not what the holidays are about for me. Thanksgiving and Christmas will be free weeks. Yes, I said WEEKS.
It takes a while to know yourself, and I've learned that this is what Myself wants and what will work for me.
Getting back to my current zone, I think another reason I'm in it is just b/c I'm continuing to figure out how to work things inti my schedule, with the baby and all. I'm figuring out what I can and cannot reasonably accomplish in a day.
Thursday, June 05, 2008
Tasting Lips of Wine
I LOVE it when I wake up in the morning after having wonderful dreams full of passion.
Call me a woman, but I prefer the romantic & passionate dreams over the hard core XXX sex ones.
Actually, it's not really romance exactly. Chocolate and roses and stuff like that are boring in dreams. I like the really passionate ones...the way you feel when you are first attracted to someone - that FIRE, you know? Lots of passion. Those dreams are awesome.
I had one last night and I feel fantastic. It feels like I just met someone new and that I've got a crush going on. I've got that glowing happy feeling.
And not that I'm overly lacking in passion in my life or that I'm unhappy right now in that way. And I'm not LOOKING for anything outside my marriage. My husband and I have a very stable kind of love (at least if you ask me today we do. Ask me again tomorrow.)...we understand each other completely. We are companions. There is still attraction and passion, but I'm sorry, it will never be the way it was 16 years ago when we first met, b/c...well...we first met 16 years ago, not yesterday! It can't be repeated! It can be revised and revisited and rekindled, but not repeated.
So the dreams and getting that feeling back is fun. In my dream last night, I met Benicio Del Toro at a party.
I used to have a huge crush on him. He can look bad, but he can look really good sometimes in a dark way. At this party, he was really into me, and I was digging it. We flirted and flirted, and ended up in some back room. I can't even remember if we kissed or did anything, but we were getting there. Just the fact that he was attracted to me was awesome.
You know how dreams are weird. Come to think of it, it wasn't really Benicio Del Toro. I mean it was supposed to be him, but he really looked more like Adrian Grenier. His eyes were definitely Adrian's.
There was also a little bit of this guy from Tracker in him, a Tracker I will not name! In my dream, this Benicio/Adrian/Tracker dude combo talked kind of funny. He was cute, but at times he looked squirrelly. But in the dream, I was like, "so he's a little odd. It's BENICIO DEL TORO! And he wants ME!".
And I woke up feeling all girlish and giddy, and I still feel that way.
I think that is the way to go. If you need that beginning of a relationship passion forever in your life, instead of getting divorced and remarried all the time in order to constantly try to maintain that beginning passion (and I know that's not the only reason people get divorced, but I do believe it's the reason for some), enjoy your dreams fully. If you don't dream, fantasize. My dreams are very safe. No one will get hurt, and I can enjoy the passion fully without any heartbreak. When I have dreams like that about my husband, that is the ideal. But I'll take movie stars, too.
Imaginary lovers
Never turn you down
When all the others turn you away
They're around
It's my private pleasure
Midnight fantasy
Someone to share my
Wildest dreams with me
Imaginary lover
You're mine anytime
Imaginary lover, oh yeah
When ordinary lovers
Don't feel what you feel
And real-life situations lose their thrill
Imagination's unreal
Imaginary lover, imaginary lover
You're mine anytime
[Instrumental Interlude]
Imaginary lovers never disagree
They always care
They're always there when you need
Satisfaction guaranteed
Imaginary lover, imaginary lover
You're mine all the time
My imaginary lover
You're mine anytime
It's a cheesy song to hear, but I like the words. And of course, don't forget The Everly Brothers:
Drea-ea-ea-ea-eam, dream, dream, dream
Drea-ea-ea-ea-eam, dream, dream, dream
When I want you in my arms
When I want you and all your charms
Whenever I want you, all I have to do is
Drea-ea-ea-ea-eam, dream, dream, dream
When I feel blue in the night
And I need you to hold me tight
Whenever I want you, all I have to do is
Drea-ea-ea-ea-eam
I can make you mine, taste your lips of wine
Anytime night or day
Only trouble is, gee whiz
I'm dreamin' my life away
I need you so that I could die
I love you so and that is why
Whenever I want you, all I have to do is
Drea-ea-ea-ea-eam, dream, dream, dream
Drea-ea-ea-ea-eam
I can make you mine, taste your lips of wine
Anytime night or day
Only trouble is, gee whiz
I'm dreamin' my life away
I need you so that I could die
I love you so and that is why
Whenever I want you, all I have to do is
Drea-ea-ea-ea-eam, dream, dream, dream
Drea-ea-ea-ea-eam, dream, dream, dream
(But, "gee-whiz", that seems to be about someone specific and a bit obsessive and melodramatic.)
Call me a woman, but I prefer the romantic & passionate dreams over the hard core XXX sex ones.
Actually, it's not really romance exactly. Chocolate and roses and stuff like that are boring in dreams. I like the really passionate ones...the way you feel when you are first attracted to someone - that FIRE, you know? Lots of passion. Those dreams are awesome.
I had one last night and I feel fantastic. It feels like I just met someone new and that I've got a crush going on. I've got that glowing happy feeling.
And not that I'm overly lacking in passion in my life or that I'm unhappy right now in that way. And I'm not LOOKING for anything outside my marriage. My husband and I have a very stable kind of love (at least if you ask me today we do. Ask me again tomorrow.)...we understand each other completely. We are companions. There is still attraction and passion, but I'm sorry, it will never be the way it was 16 years ago when we first met, b/c...well...we first met 16 years ago, not yesterday! It can't be repeated! It can be revised and revisited and rekindled, but not repeated.
So the dreams and getting that feeling back is fun. In my dream last night, I met Benicio Del Toro at a party.
I used to have a huge crush on him. He can look bad, but he can look really good sometimes in a dark way. At this party, he was really into me, and I was digging it. We flirted and flirted, and ended up in some back room. I can't even remember if we kissed or did anything, but we were getting there. Just the fact that he was attracted to me was awesome.You know how dreams are weird. Come to think of it, it wasn't really Benicio Del Toro. I mean it was supposed to be him, but he really looked more like Adrian Grenier. His eyes were definitely Adrian's.
There was also a little bit of this guy from Tracker in him, a Tracker I will not name! In my dream, this Benicio/Adrian/Tracker dude combo talked kind of funny. He was cute, but at times he looked squirrelly. But in the dream, I was like, "so he's a little odd. It's BENICIO DEL TORO! And he wants ME!".
And I woke up feeling all girlish and giddy, and I still feel that way.
I think that is the way to go. If you need that beginning of a relationship passion forever in your life, instead of getting divorced and remarried all the time in order to constantly try to maintain that beginning passion (and I know that's not the only reason people get divorced, but I do believe it's the reason for some), enjoy your dreams fully. If you don't dream, fantasize. My dreams are very safe. No one will get hurt, and I can enjoy the passion fully without any heartbreak. When I have dreams like that about my husband, that is the ideal. But I'll take movie stars, too.
Imaginary lovers
Never turn you down
When all the others turn you away
They're around
It's my private pleasure
Midnight fantasy
Someone to share my
Wildest dreams with me
Imaginary lover
You're mine anytime
Imaginary lover, oh yeah
When ordinary lovers
Don't feel what you feel
And real-life situations lose their thrill
Imagination's unreal
Imaginary lover, imaginary lover
You're mine anytime
[Instrumental Interlude]
Imaginary lovers never disagree
They always care
They're always there when you need
Satisfaction guaranteed
Imaginary lover, imaginary lover
You're mine all the time
My imaginary lover
You're mine anytime
It's a cheesy song to hear, but I like the words. And of course, don't forget The Everly Brothers:
Drea-ea-ea-ea-eam, dream, dream, dream
Drea-ea-ea-ea-eam, dream, dream, dream
When I want you in my arms
When I want you and all your charms
Whenever I want you, all I have to do is
Drea-ea-ea-ea-eam, dream, dream, dream
When I feel blue in the night
And I need you to hold me tight
Whenever I want you, all I have to do is
Drea-ea-ea-ea-eam
I can make you mine, taste your lips of wine
Anytime night or day
Only trouble is, gee whiz
I'm dreamin' my life away
I need you so that I could die
I love you so and that is why
Whenever I want you, all I have to do is
Drea-ea-ea-ea-eam, dream, dream, dream
Drea-ea-ea-ea-eam
I can make you mine, taste your lips of wine
Anytime night or day
Only trouble is, gee whiz
I'm dreamin' my life away
I need you so that I could die
I love you so and that is why
Whenever I want you, all I have to do is
Drea-ea-ea-ea-eam, dream, dream, dream
Drea-ea-ea-ea-eam, dream, dream, dream
(But, "gee-whiz", that seems to be about someone specific and a bit obsessive and melodramatic.)
Tuesday, May 20, 2008
If you are my husband, don't EVER respond to a personal ad. In fact, don't even look at them. Don't even THINK about them.
I listened to The Pina Colada Song on the way to work today, word for word. I mean I really listened to the story.
At the end, they are all "oh ha ha, ah me, it's YOU! " chuckle chuckle giggle.
Let me just say that if this scenario happened to my husband and me, a huge fight would ensue.
"What the f? Why the hell are you placing personal ads looking to screw someone? Pina coladas my ass"
"Well, what about YOU?? You just did the same thing and I caught you!"
"Oh, well, uh, no you didn't. I only did this to see if I could trick YOU into responding, and you FAILED the test!"
"why are you testing me???"
etc.
At least that's how things would happen in my dysfunctional world. That wouldn't make for as good of a song though. :)
At the end, they are all "oh ha ha, ah me, it's YOU! " chuckle chuckle giggle.
Let me just say that if this scenario happened to my husband and me, a huge fight would ensue.
"What the f? Why the hell are you placing personal ads looking to screw someone? Pina coladas my ass"
"Well, what about YOU?? You just did the same thing and I caught you!"
"Oh, well, uh, no you didn't. I only did this to see if I could trick YOU into responding, and you FAILED the test!"
"why are you testing me???"
etc.
At least that's how things would happen in my dysfunctional world. That wouldn't make for as good of a song though. :)
Tuesday, April 29, 2008
Do you ever...
....drive through a stoplight following other cars, and then wonder afterwards if the light was really green?
...drive all the way to work and then realize you don't remember anything at all about the drive?
These things happen to me all the time. Especially with regards to the latter, this is why it is advised that you take different routes to routine destinations every now and again. You become so familiar with the same routes, that you get too comfortable (and in my case, you start daydreaming about how you are a rock star, or about how the person you had a crush on in h.s. is going to think you are SO HOT at your 20-year reunion next year and will gaze at you from across the room wishing they had you and how they will rue the day they rejected you....all with the music on the radio as the backdrop to the scene), and are therefore more likely to have an accident. That is why they say accidents are more likely to happen closer to home.
And those are Karla's Words of Wisdom for the day. Or maybe Karla's Stating the Obvious.
In any case, I had to put a post above my Sick of Shit post, which has been there forever, and which I keep reading as SACK of Shit. I have not been Sick of Shit for this long, I promise. It was just a day or two, at most. Now, I am thoroughly enjoying the shit for all it's color and aroma. After all, it never really goes away; it's all in how you choose to deal with it.
...drive all the way to work and then realize you don't remember anything at all about the drive?
These things happen to me all the time. Especially with regards to the latter, this is why it is advised that you take different routes to routine destinations every now and again. You become so familiar with the same routes, that you get too comfortable (and in my case, you start daydreaming about how you are a rock star, or about how the person you had a crush on in h.s. is going to think you are SO HOT at your 20-year reunion next year and will gaze at you from across the room wishing they had you and how they will rue the day they rejected you....all with the music on the radio as the backdrop to the scene), and are therefore more likely to have an accident. That is why they say accidents are more likely to happen closer to home.
And those are Karla's Words of Wisdom for the day. Or maybe Karla's Stating the Obvious.
In any case, I had to put a post above my Sick of Shit post, which has been there forever, and which I keep reading as SACK of Shit. I have not been Sick of Shit for this long, I promise. It was just a day or two, at most. Now, I am thoroughly enjoying the shit for all it's color and aroma. After all, it never really goes away; it's all in how you choose to deal with it.
Tuesday, April 15, 2008
sick of shit
I am at a point, unfortunately, where I am sick of everyone's shit. Just sick of it. Whine whine whine...right? no - I don't freaking have a hard life. I have an easy life. But one more little shovel of shit and I swear....I am on the brink. I am sick of people's fucking bullshit and the pile and stink it is making on my otherwise happy life.
Something has got to change. Me. Other people. Things. Something.
Something has got to change. Me. Other people. Things. Something.
Friday, April 04, 2008
Comments on a play..
My husband and I went to see an interesting play Saturday: The Persecution and Assassination of Jean-Claude Marat by the Marquis De Sade. See if you can follow this: It was supposed to be De Sade's play, that de Sade wrote to be acted out by the inmates of the asylum in which he was committed in the 18th century. But really, the play was written by a 20th century playwright; he wrote it as if it was de Sade writing it. To make matters more confusing, the play we were watching was supposed to be acted out by modern inmates in a modern asylum, but they were pretending to be the 18th century inmates. So it was a play within a play within a play.
So the whole time, I thought it was supposed to be de Sade and Marat and Charlotte Corday (Marat's murderer) actually as inmates in the asylum....but really they were just inmates pretending to be those characters. Actually, they were inmates pretending to be those inmates pretending to be those characters.
It was so weird...it was in a smaller theater where you sit very close to the stage, the seats wrapping around the stage. The whole thing was set up as if you were in a real insane asylum. As we waited in line to enter the theater, a girl walked around yelling at everyone to turn their cell phones off b/c the inmates will go nutso if they ring. Cute.
Then they only let us in one at a time. After they beckoned me, I walked up to the door, away a bit from the rest of the line, and had to wait for the door opener to get some queue that it was okay to enter...then they open the door, say you can go in, and close it behind you (the door having these loud bam! and clicking noises as if really asylum doors). Next you wait in a waiting room for a sec, and another guy sprinkles holy water or something on the wall and lets you in. Crazy!
The theater was almost full when I walked in, so I just waited for my husband by the door. All of the "inmates" were mostly naked (they had flesh colored undies on) and were lined up, stoic and expressionless, against the back walls of the theater, behind the seats.
So my husband and I ended up in the front row (I think everyone else was too chicken to take those seats, so we didn't have much of a choice. Some of the inmates were at our feet half of the time), and when the play started , all of the inmates ran up on stage and starting hastily wrapping themselves in this gauze like stuff, and then the play began.
I could go on and on, but I'll just say the play was really good...and eerie...and interesting. There was a lot of groping and sexuality about it (being it is supposed to be about de Sade, after all).
The guy who played Marat had a fantastic body. OMG. He was half-naked too... just a beautiful physique. He was also a great actor. His voice inflection reminded me of Ralph Fiennes. The guy who played de Sade was an excellent actor, as well, but not as great of a body. He was thin...which I imagine de Sade to be tall and thin. Actually, I've looked it up, and he ended up being quite obese in his older age. I'm not sure how old he was supposed to be in this play. Charlotte Corday was also very good, and and quite attractive and appealing as an actress. Most of the other actors could really look in to doing some Body for Life. :)
When the play was over, the "inmates" stripped down out of their gauze wraps, ran off the stage, and lined up against the wall again, except this time, they were facing the wall with their backs to us. That was even freakier than the beginning. It reminded me of the Blair Witch Project.
And like the end of the BWP when I saw it in the theater, the audience just sat there in the end not knowing what to do. So we all just awkwardly clapped...but the actors stayed in character and never came back to bow or any of that. It just got all quiet, everyone sat there for a couple of seconds, and then we started quietly filing out of there. Cool.
(btw...I wish I would have let my cell phone ring. No one's did. I wonder if they worked it in the play to actually go berserk if one started ringing)
So the whole time, I thought it was supposed to be de Sade and Marat and Charlotte Corday (Marat's murderer) actually as inmates in the asylum....but really they were just inmates pretending to be those characters. Actually, they were inmates pretending to be those inmates pretending to be those characters.
It was so weird...it was in a smaller theater where you sit very close to the stage, the seats wrapping around the stage. The whole thing was set up as if you were in a real insane asylum. As we waited in line to enter the theater, a girl walked around yelling at everyone to turn their cell phones off b/c the inmates will go nutso if they ring. Cute.
Then they only let us in one at a time. After they beckoned me, I walked up to the door, away a bit from the rest of the line, and had to wait for the door opener to get some queue that it was okay to enter...then they open the door, say you can go in, and close it behind you (the door having these loud bam! and clicking noises as if really asylum doors). Next you wait in a waiting room for a sec, and another guy sprinkles holy water or something on the wall and lets you in. Crazy!
The theater was almost full when I walked in, so I just waited for my husband by the door. All of the "inmates" were mostly naked (they had flesh colored undies on) and were lined up, stoic and expressionless, against the back walls of the theater, behind the seats.
So my husband and I ended up in the front row (I think everyone else was too chicken to take those seats, so we didn't have much of a choice. Some of the inmates were at our feet half of the time), and when the play started , all of the inmates ran up on stage and starting hastily wrapping themselves in this gauze like stuff, and then the play began.
I could go on and on, but I'll just say the play was really good...and eerie...and interesting. There was a lot of groping and sexuality about it (being it is supposed to be about de Sade, after all).
The guy who played Marat had a fantastic body. OMG. He was half-naked too... just a beautiful physique. He was also a great actor. His voice inflection reminded me of Ralph Fiennes. The guy who played de Sade was an excellent actor, as well, but not as great of a body. He was thin...which I imagine de Sade to be tall and thin. Actually, I've looked it up, and he ended up being quite obese in his older age. I'm not sure how old he was supposed to be in this play. Charlotte Corday was also very good, and and quite attractive and appealing as an actress. Most of the other actors could really look in to doing some Body for Life. :)
When the play was over, the "inmates" stripped down out of their gauze wraps, ran off the stage, and lined up against the wall again, except this time, they were facing the wall with their backs to us. That was even freakier than the beginning. It reminded me of the Blair Witch Project.
And like the end of the BWP when I saw it in the theater, the audience just sat there in the end not knowing what to do. So we all just awkwardly clapped...but the actors stayed in character and never came back to bow or any of that. It just got all quiet, everyone sat there for a couple of seconds, and then we started quietly filing out of there. Cool.
(btw...I wish I would have let my cell phone ring. No one's did. I wonder if they worked it in the play to actually go berserk if one started ringing)
Thursday, April 03, 2008
I don't care what anyone says...
...but is is tough finding time to exercise properly when you have a child.
I am not talking about using the fact that you have a child as an excuse not to exercise. It can be done. I'm just saying all things being equal, it is way tougher to find time to work out if you have a child than if not. I should add in particular that I'm talking about babies really. Mine is 19 months old. I can't say yet if it is more difficult if one has older children.
I speak from experience. I was without child for more than 10 years after I got married. Without a baby, really, I had all the time in the world to do whatever I wanted. My husband was/is not an obstacle at all, as he is generally supportive of most of my endeavors. Besides, he was working 2nd shift (i.e. I was alone from 5 pm to 2 am nightly), so I had all kinds of time to myself - to exercise, sing karaoke, perform rock operas in my living room - whatever!
I am not complaining. I LOVE being a mom and having a son, and I don't miss my past life and don't want it any other way. I am only comparing my life pre-child versus post-child when it comes to working out....and as I said, all things being equal, it is way more difficult to find the time. That is, if you want to be a good mom.
I could ignore my kid and do what I want to do, but I don't want to do that. A big part of this problem is that I work 40 hours a week outside the home. So I really want to spend time with him...as much time as possible, when I am home. That, to me, is more important than getting a workout in.
I know it's important to keep my own health up, too, for the sake of my son, and I'm still doing that. But damn...if time is tight, and I have a choice of working out for an hour versus playing with my baby after not seeing him all day, you are damn right that I am playing with the baby.
In some ways, being a SAHM might be harder, but I know I'd get my workouts in if I was one, and I'd get a heck a lot more stuff down around the house, too. For one thing, my mom can watch the baby one day a week so that would buy me some time. Also, at this writing, baby sleeps for 2-4 hours in the afternoon, so I get stuff done then on weekends (if I don't crash), so I know I could do it on week days, too.
Right now, all I do is work all day then take care of my family on week days, with barely anything extra home-wise on weekends. My household management has gone to hell in a hand basket. I literally don't have the time! And I'm not even watching much TV or wasting my time in ways like that. We end up having the same Netflix movies for months due to the lack of time, in fact. I don't have much time for the computer either...I have to schedule it in if I want to indulge.
My wanting to spend time with baby has nothing to do with my husband helping or not helping either. He helps. I am just really attached to the little guy (baby, not husband. He's not little. So he likes to think), and I want to keep it that way.
This is one of those things that I was wrong about pre-motherhood. I thought moms were just making all kinds of excuses and were lame. But now I understand (and the list of things I "understand" now goes on and on...you really CANNOT judge ANYONE unless you've lived their lives...it's true. And since you will never live someone else's life directly, you can never judge.).
That said...I am still getting my workouts in (although it may not be absolute perfection like I aspired to pre-baby), and having children is still not a good excuse for not exercising at all. I'm just saying, it is a lot harder than it was when it was just me I had to think about.
And I just have one child. I can't imagine 5, or having 3 below the age of 5, or anything like that. I would think it would be damn near impossible if that were the case, whether you are a SAHM or not.
Now, as my son gets older and becomes not so dependent on me for his every need (and in fact wants me to get out of his face which will be duly noted by the "KEEP OUT" sign on his bedroom door) , I would imagine it'll get easier to get my time in. Unless of course I'm spending all my spare time running around to soccer games and practice.
In conclusion, I don't care what anyone says, it is way harder to find any kind of me time, let alone to work out, for an hour if you have a 19-month old son versus having no kids at all. It can be done, but it takes a lot more planning and energy and resources. Everyone should respect that fact.
I am not talking about using the fact that you have a child as an excuse not to exercise. It can be done. I'm just saying all things being equal, it is way tougher to find time to work out if you have a child than if not. I should add in particular that I'm talking about babies really. Mine is 19 months old. I can't say yet if it is more difficult if one has older children.
I speak from experience. I was without child for more than 10 years after I got married. Without a baby, really, I had all the time in the world to do whatever I wanted. My husband was/is not an obstacle at all, as he is generally supportive of most of my endeavors. Besides, he was working 2nd shift (i.e. I was alone from 5 pm to 2 am nightly), so I had all kinds of time to myself - to exercise, sing karaoke, perform rock operas in my living room - whatever!
I am not complaining. I LOVE being a mom and having a son, and I don't miss my past life and don't want it any other way. I am only comparing my life pre-child versus post-child when it comes to working out....and as I said, all things being equal, it is way more difficult to find the time. That is, if you want to be a good mom.
I could ignore my kid and do what I want to do, but I don't want to do that. A big part of this problem is that I work 40 hours a week outside the home. So I really want to spend time with him...as much time as possible, when I am home. That, to me, is more important than getting a workout in.
I know it's important to keep my own health up, too, for the sake of my son, and I'm still doing that. But damn...if time is tight, and I have a choice of working out for an hour versus playing with my baby after not seeing him all day, you are damn right that I am playing with the baby.
In some ways, being a SAHM might be harder, but I know I'd get my workouts in if I was one, and I'd get a heck a lot more stuff down around the house, too. For one thing, my mom can watch the baby one day a week so that would buy me some time. Also, at this writing, baby sleeps for 2-4 hours in the afternoon, so I get stuff done then on weekends (if I don't crash), so I know I could do it on week days, too.
Right now, all I do is work all day then take care of my family on week days, with barely anything extra home-wise on weekends. My household management has gone to hell in a hand basket. I literally don't have the time! And I'm not even watching much TV or wasting my time in ways like that. We end up having the same Netflix movies for months due to the lack of time, in fact. I don't have much time for the computer either...I have to schedule it in if I want to indulge.
My wanting to spend time with baby has nothing to do with my husband helping or not helping either. He helps. I am just really attached to the little guy (baby, not husband. He's not little. So he likes to think), and I want to keep it that way.
This is one of those things that I was wrong about pre-motherhood. I thought moms were just making all kinds of excuses and were lame. But now I understand (and the list of things I "understand" now goes on and on...you really CANNOT judge ANYONE unless you've lived their lives...it's true. And since you will never live someone else's life directly, you can never judge.).
That said...I am still getting my workouts in (although it may not be absolute perfection like I aspired to pre-baby), and having children is still not a good excuse for not exercising at all. I'm just saying, it is a lot harder than it was when it was just me I had to think about.
And I just have one child. I can't imagine 5, or having 3 below the age of 5, or anything like that. I would think it would be damn near impossible if that were the case, whether you are a SAHM or not.
Now, as my son gets older and becomes not so dependent on me for his every need (and in fact wants me to get out of his face which will be duly noted by the "KEEP OUT" sign on his bedroom door) , I would imagine it'll get easier to get my time in. Unless of course I'm spending all my spare time running around to soccer games and practice.
In conclusion, I don't care what anyone says, it is way harder to find any kind of me time, let alone to work out, for an hour if you have a 19-month old son versus having no kids at all. It can be done, but it takes a lot more planning and energy and resources. Everyone should respect that fact.
Wednesday, April 02, 2008
Friday, February 15, 2008
Berger Time
And moving on to an entirely offbeat subject, as is the usual fare with me:
What is the deal with these freaking big ass boogers?
I mean, I am not sick. I do not have a cold. Yet every morning I wake up with these gigantic boogers in my nose. And I'm sorry, but the only way to get them out is with the good ol' finger. However, I am not rubbing them off on the dresser, nor am I eating them. Ewww. Heh...I wait until I get in the bathroom for nasal exploration, where I dispose of them properly in my husband's sink. Kidding! A tissue.
But still...these big ass boogers. What the heck? It's an almost strange satisfaction to get them. out.
My husband is getting them, too. Is there something wrong with the air quality in our house? Is it just b/c it's so freaking dry right now? We run the humidifier at night. So is there mold or dust in our house, or what????
anyway...
***************************************************************
Related to boogers, for reasons unknown to me, my parents pronounce "boogers" as "bergers". If you are raised to pronounce a word the wrong way, you don't know any better. Let me share the story of the day I discovered I did not pronounce this word correctly. I'll give you three guesses as to how I learned this:
1) Looked it up in Webster's
2) My parents realized their mistake and then re-taught me the correct pronunciation
3) I was made fun of by other kids
If you picked either 1) or 2), you lived a very sheltered life. You were also very smart and had open-minded parents.
I was at a slumber party in 5th or 6th grade, slumber parties being the mecca for personal slander against your peers (I was made fun of at 10 years old for never having French kissed before. French kissing at 11? And this was 1981!! See...kids have been messing around like that for years...)
Who knows how the topic surfaced, but I sad the toxic word for whatever reason:
"Berger"
"WHAT??? What did you just say???"
(again..I am nor never was good with the comebacks or the impromptu task of saving myself from embarrassment. So, I just meekly said it again, the wrong way, again, like an idiot)
"berger....????"
(finger pointing...)
"BWHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAAHAAHAHAH!!!!! DID YOU HEAR WHAT KARLA SAID? SHE SAID 'BERGER'. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHA!!!:
(I should add that this bitch was the leader of the popular pack at the time [she later became the class whore and flunked out], so the other kids joined in unison):
"BWHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHA!!! SHE SAID 'BERGER'!!!!
(the only response I could think of, said again, very meekly:)
"Well, how do you say it then?"
"BOO-ger. It's BOO-ger"
(said in the most exaggerated way possible, both for effect and for corrective purposes)
(more laughter)
at which my time honored response was:
...
...
...
to look like I was about to cry.
"What's wrong with YOU??? You look like you are about to cry!!!"
And so in true 5th grade melodramatic fashion, I do an about face and go running into the bathroom, slamming and locking the door behind me.
Still staying true to form in 5th grade fashion, the other girls form a committee outside the door, trying to decide what to do next, everyone wanting to be the savior of the situation. I heard the popular girl exclaim "I'm the one who did it! I should be the one she lets in".
Then the mom intervened and seemed rather annoyed by my tactics, so I eventually came out on my own. I actually don't remember what happened immediately following that. I remember lying that I just didn't feel good, and then the mom offering me various medicines that I refused.
This same leader of the pack girl, by the way, created a bit of a fiasco at my own slumber party when she mooned us all. But it wasn't her fault. We had put her into a trance.
Anyway, that's my boo-ger story. And for a long time, I still pronoucned it wrong. I kept exaggerating the BOO...like the mean girl did at the party. It wasn't until I met my husband that I was properly and finally (but nicely) corrected once and for all. Thank God I can finally say that word right.
What is the deal with these freaking big ass boogers?
I mean, I am not sick. I do not have a cold. Yet every morning I wake up with these gigantic boogers in my nose. And I'm sorry, but the only way to get them out is with the good ol' finger. However, I am not rubbing them off on the dresser, nor am I eating them. Ewww. Heh...I wait until I get in the bathroom for nasal exploration, where I dispose of them properly in my husband's sink. Kidding! A tissue.
But still...these big ass boogers. What the heck? It's an almost strange satisfaction to get them. out.
My husband is getting them, too. Is there something wrong with the air quality in our house? Is it just b/c it's so freaking dry right now? We run the humidifier at night. So is there mold or dust in our house, or what????
anyway...
***************************************************************
Related to boogers, for reasons unknown to me, my parents pronounce "boogers" as "bergers". If you are raised to pronounce a word the wrong way, you don't know any better. Let me share the story of the day I discovered I did not pronounce this word correctly. I'll give you three guesses as to how I learned this:
1) Looked it up in Webster's
2) My parents realized their mistake and then re-taught me the correct pronunciation
3) I was made fun of by other kids
If you picked either 1) or 2), you lived a very sheltered life. You were also very smart and had open-minded parents.
I was at a slumber party in 5th or 6th grade, slumber parties being the mecca for personal slander against your peers (I was made fun of at 10 years old for never having French kissed before. French kissing at 11? And this was 1981!! See...kids have been messing around like that for years...)
Who knows how the topic surfaced, but I sad the toxic word for whatever reason:
"Berger"
"WHAT??? What did you just say???"
(again..I am nor never was good with the comebacks or the impromptu task of saving myself from embarrassment. So, I just meekly said it again, the wrong way, again, like an idiot)
"berger....????"
(finger pointing...)
"BWHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAAHAAHAHAH!!!!! DID YOU HEAR WHAT KARLA SAID? SHE SAID 'BERGER'. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHA!!!:
(I should add that this bitch was the leader of the popular pack at the time [she later became the class whore and flunked out], so the other kids joined in unison):
"BWHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHA!!! SHE SAID 'BERGER'!!!!
(the only response I could think of, said again, very meekly:)
"Well, how do you say it then?"
"BOO-ger. It's BOO-ger"
(said in the most exaggerated way possible, both for effect and for corrective purposes)
(more laughter)
at which my time honored response was:
...
...
...
to look like I was about to cry.
"What's wrong with YOU??? You look like you are about to cry!!!"
And so in true 5th grade melodramatic fashion, I do an about face and go running into the bathroom, slamming and locking the door behind me.
Still staying true to form in 5th grade fashion, the other girls form a committee outside the door, trying to decide what to do next, everyone wanting to be the savior of the situation. I heard the popular girl exclaim "I'm the one who did it! I should be the one she lets in".
Then the mom intervened and seemed rather annoyed by my tactics, so I eventually came out on my own. I actually don't remember what happened immediately following that. I remember lying that I just didn't feel good, and then the mom offering me various medicines that I refused.
This same leader of the pack girl, by the way, created a bit of a fiasco at my own slumber party when she mooned us all. But it wasn't her fault. We had put her into a trance.
Anyway, that's my boo-ger story. And for a long time, I still pronoucned it wrong. I kept exaggerating the BOO...like the mean girl did at the party. It wasn't until I met my husband that I was properly and finally (but nicely) corrected once and for all. Thank God I can finally say that word right.
Thursday, February 14, 2008
Fat Lipped Girls Make the Rockin' World Go Round
Celebrities, rich women, regular women, whomever: You need to stop getting lip injections or implants to make your lips look bigger and thicker.
Seriously.
Stop it.
Now.
It's hideous.
Naturally thick lips are, or can be, beautiful. See Angelina Jolie.
Artificially thickened lips are hideous.
I don't understand why people think these are necessary. Granted, I have thin lips, but I'd much rather have these naturally thin lips than those unnaturally thickened lips.
I've seen studies before regarding this and how it all goes down to the biological level of physical attraction. These studies say that thickened lips remind the male counterpart of our species of the labia, and thickened, engorged labia are a sign of sexual arousal. Therefore, thick lips (back to the face again here) are supposed to be attractive.
Hey, again, naturally thick lips, cool. Fake ones look really bad, especially when the owners start trying to talk with them.
As far as sexual arousal, and the possibility that maybe blow jobs are better with thick lips...well...at least I've got a long tongue that I can point at will. (and please....do not get surgery to make your tongue long and pointy. Work with what you've got, people).
Tuesday, February 12, 2008
Sarcasm School
EDIT 2-15-08: I've decided to delete most of this post for the simple reason that I do not like to slam my friends on the internet. I think that is in bad form. I feel better now that I vented, and I think I've found novel and witty ways to deal with her. I trust everyone that read it agreed with me. If you didn't have a chance to read it, well, I'm sure you weren't missing much.
**************************************************************************
And related to my previous post about being positive..."When Sarcasm Goes Wrong":
Being sarcastic can be funny. Being sarcastic can also be mean, also known as "sardonic" - cruelly sarcastic. I have made the mistake many times, but I don't like it when I make that mistake. My aim is to be witty, or funny at best, not to hurt people.
Sarcasm should be used carefully. It probably shouldn't be used at all when talking about other people, as opposed to using it regarding situations.
[rest of this deleted...see above]
[all you need to know is:.........]
She needs a lesson in sarcasm. She needs to enroll in Sarcasm School.
**************************************************************************
And related to my previous post about being positive..."When Sarcasm Goes Wrong":
Being sarcastic can be funny. Being sarcastic can also be mean, also known as "sardonic" - cruelly sarcastic. I have made the mistake many times, but I don't like it when I make that mistake. My aim is to be witty, or funny at best, not to hurt people.
Sarcasm should be used carefully. It probably shouldn't be used at all when talking about other people, as opposed to using it regarding situations.
[rest of this deleted...see above]
[all you need to know is:.........]
She needs a lesson in sarcasm. She needs to enroll in Sarcasm School.
Tuesday, February 05, 2008
On Being Positive
I am on a new, or rather, renewed quest to be a positive person.
I was reading a motivational book by a religious guy. I had to stop reading though when he got just a little *too* Jesus-y on me. I "believe" and all that. I really do. It's just that, I have my own style of worship, and well...my style is just not like the author's style. I like his sermons, but, well, I just don't quote scripture to people. I just don't. I don't think there is anything wrong with it, although I can't imagine hanging out with a script quoter all day if they did it all day like that. I can't explain it other than I just don't quote scripture out loud all day. If you knew me in person, you'd understand.
Back to the point, much of his message is plain logic, and true. This is true for fitness or for any aspect of your life, but he is saying that you are what you think you are. You feel what you think you feel. If you have positive thoughts and positive outlooks, that's what you'll get. The opposite is true of negative thoughts and feelings. In psychology, it's called the "self-fulfilling prophecy".
I have spent my whole life being a negative person, unfortantly. I never realized this until recently. I don't believe most negative people know what downers they are. I'm not even going to go into the background of why I have been negative - I could come up with a million reasons - but I don't think it's important. What is important now is today and the future.
I once had a "friend" tell me about 10 years ago that I was too negative for her to hang out with anymore. That hurt like heck and I didn't believe her. I see her point now, although she did not go about it in the right way...her approach was wrong (i.e. she was pretty mean to me about it). But maybe there is no right approach to that. She was trying to get rid of the negative influences in her life, friends that would bring her down in their negativity, and that is what I am trying to do now. Actually, I've been working on that the last few years. There are no friends I'm going to dump at the moment, heh.
Currently, I am working on controlling my own thoughts. I used to be really down on myself. That aspect of negativity I think I have mostly conquered.
What I really have to work on now is not being so negative about other people, and about certain hands that fate had dealt me or continues to deal to me, or rather, the hands fate seems to deal me, in my warped perception.
My husband is really bad at this (I hope I didn't make him this way after living w/me for so long), and we feed off each other. We automatically assume the worst in people, and in situations. We have gone to the grocery store hating every person we ran into b/c they "got into our way" or "purposely" did something to slight us. Driving is horrid. Everyone and every thing is out to get us. Every company and business is out to screw us over.
Whew....what a drag! I don't want to be that way anymore. There's a difference between joking around about how stupid people are, and really hating your fellow men and women. It brings you down, and bad stuff does happen to you, if that's the way you want to look at.
But we have so many blessings, too many to take for granted. I'm not sure if I can change my husband's way of thinking, but I am hoping that my positive outlook will eventually rub off on him.
So every day, I drown out negative thoughts with positive ones, and I tell myself good things will happen. I look in the mirror and tell myself that I am going to have a good day. I try to watch and read mostly positive movies and books, and if I watch or read downers, I don't see it as a reflection of my own life. I want my son to learn a positive way of thinking from me. It would be way easier to learn that from your parents and to grow up with it, than to try at 37 like I am.
It's not easy. And I screw up all the time. But, I already feel happier, and feel that things will get even better and that the future is bright.
I'm not sure how this will affect my cynical/sarcastic sense of humor. I always found that to be interesting in other people. Writing about all happy stuff seems boring. Oh well...I'm sure my entire personality won't change. I know it won't. But I at least don't want to go around hating people and smothering myself in self pity about how everyone has done me wrong.
The author told a story of how his mother was diagnosed with terminal cancer, and given just weeks to live. They prayed every day for a miracle, and every day, his mother quoted scripture having to do with recovery and healing. And she was saved and didn't die. That was the 80's and she's alive today.
Now, I *do* believe in the power of prayer, which goes along with fate and positive thinking. In fact, I think it does no good to worry or to give up, and that positive thoughts can go a long way. I'll even go so far to say that I believe in miracles (you sexay thing (a song. Never mind. The Full Monty? anyone???).
What I didn't like about the story, and maybe this is that cynic in me again, but to me the story insinuated that the reason our loved ones have passed away is b/c we didn't pray hard enough or weren't positive enough. I immediately thought of my grandma who died from cancer in 1987. Did I not pray hard enough? Was I not positive enough? (and I didn't pray and wasn't very positive at 16. I was scared out of my mind (of death - as in, of seeing her in a dying state) for one thing...)
People are going to die some day. I want to think positive and pray that my parents or no one else I love will never have to suffer in any way, but I don't want to feel guilty if they die, although I will feel pain in other ways.
*****************************************************************************
In conclusion...I am certain that one of my future posts will be a cynical look at how stupid people are. This quest is more about how I think in my head...how when I lay in bed at night, I replace obsessive thoughts of past mistakes I have made, or past fights, or things that stressed me out in the past (deaths of pets, doing poorly in college, not making the h.s. volleyball team, etc - I've been known to obsess and think about all these things and other things, even visualizing my own funeral or the funerals of loved ones that I don't want to die, for goodness sakes), with the happiest thoughts I have, like remembering being pregnant and the baby as he has gotten older, of every happy memory I can think of. It has made my days and nights much more enjoyable.
I was reading a motivational book by a religious guy. I had to stop reading though when he got just a little *too* Jesus-y on me. I "believe" and all that. I really do. It's just that, I have my own style of worship, and well...my style is just not like the author's style. I like his sermons, but, well, I just don't quote scripture to people. I just don't. I don't think there is anything wrong with it, although I can't imagine hanging out with a script quoter all day if they did it all day like that. I can't explain it other than I just don't quote scripture out loud all day. If you knew me in person, you'd understand.
Back to the point, much of his message is plain logic, and true. This is true for fitness or for any aspect of your life, but he is saying that you are what you think you are. You feel what you think you feel. If you have positive thoughts and positive outlooks, that's what you'll get. The opposite is true of negative thoughts and feelings. In psychology, it's called the "self-fulfilling prophecy".
I have spent my whole life being a negative person, unfortantly. I never realized this until recently. I don't believe most negative people know what downers they are. I'm not even going to go into the background of why I have been negative - I could come up with a million reasons - but I don't think it's important. What is important now is today and the future.
I once had a "friend" tell me about 10 years ago that I was too negative for her to hang out with anymore. That hurt like heck and I didn't believe her. I see her point now, although she did not go about it in the right way...her approach was wrong (i.e. she was pretty mean to me about it). But maybe there is no right approach to that. She was trying to get rid of the negative influences in her life, friends that would bring her down in their negativity, and that is what I am trying to do now. Actually, I've been working on that the last few years. There are no friends I'm going to dump at the moment, heh.
Currently, I am working on controlling my own thoughts. I used to be really down on myself. That aspect of negativity I think I have mostly conquered.
What I really have to work on now is not being so negative about other people, and about certain hands that fate had dealt me or continues to deal to me, or rather, the hands fate seems to deal me, in my warped perception.
My husband is really bad at this (I hope I didn't make him this way after living w/me for so long), and we feed off each other. We automatically assume the worst in people, and in situations. We have gone to the grocery store hating every person we ran into b/c they "got into our way" or "purposely" did something to slight us. Driving is horrid. Everyone and every thing is out to get us. Every company and business is out to screw us over.
Whew....what a drag! I don't want to be that way anymore. There's a difference between joking around about how stupid people are, and really hating your fellow men and women. It brings you down, and bad stuff does happen to you, if that's the way you want to look at.
But we have so many blessings, too many to take for granted. I'm not sure if I can change my husband's way of thinking, but I am hoping that my positive outlook will eventually rub off on him.
So every day, I drown out negative thoughts with positive ones, and I tell myself good things will happen. I look in the mirror and tell myself that I am going to have a good day. I try to watch and read mostly positive movies and books, and if I watch or read downers, I don't see it as a reflection of my own life. I want my son to learn a positive way of thinking from me. It would be way easier to learn that from your parents and to grow up with it, than to try at 37 like I am.
It's not easy. And I screw up all the time. But, I already feel happier, and feel that things will get even better and that the future is bright.
I'm not sure how this will affect my cynical/sarcastic sense of humor. I always found that to be interesting in other people. Writing about all happy stuff seems boring. Oh well...I'm sure my entire personality won't change. I know it won't. But I at least don't want to go around hating people and smothering myself in self pity about how everyone has done me wrong.
***************************************************************************
One thing that bothered me about that book was this:
The author told a story of how his mother was diagnosed with terminal cancer, and given just weeks to live. They prayed every day for a miracle, and every day, his mother quoted scripture having to do with recovery and healing. And she was saved and didn't die. That was the 80's and she's alive today.
Now, I *do* believe in the power of prayer, which goes along with fate and positive thinking. In fact, I think it does no good to worry or to give up, and that positive thoughts can go a long way. I'll even go so far to say that I believe in miracles (you sexay thing (a song. Never mind. The Full Monty? anyone???).
What I didn't like about the story, and maybe this is that cynic in me again, but to me the story insinuated that the reason our loved ones have passed away is b/c we didn't pray hard enough or weren't positive enough. I immediately thought of my grandma who died from cancer in 1987. Did I not pray hard enough? Was I not positive enough? (and I didn't pray and wasn't very positive at 16. I was scared out of my mind (of death - as in, of seeing her in a dying state) for one thing...)
People are going to die some day. I want to think positive and pray that my parents or no one else I love will never have to suffer in any way, but I don't want to feel guilty if they die, although I will feel pain in other ways.
*****************************************************************************
In conclusion...I am certain that one of my future posts will be a cynical look at how stupid people are. This quest is more about how I think in my head...how when I lay in bed at night, I replace obsessive thoughts of past mistakes I have made, or past fights, or things that stressed me out in the past (deaths of pets, doing poorly in college, not making the h.s. volleyball team, etc - I've been known to obsess and think about all these things and other things, even visualizing my own funeral or the funerals of loved ones that I don't want to die, for goodness sakes), with the happiest thoughts I have, like remembering being pregnant and the baby as he has gotten older, of every happy memory I can think of. It has made my days and nights much more enjoyable.
Wednesday, January 23, 2008
Tuesday, January 08, 2008
Pee Control...Issues much?
You know that Prince song "Pussy Control"? Funny song. My husband hates it. Anyway, this is about Pee Control...issues.
This happens just about every morning: I'm in that early morning state of drifting in and out of a light sleep. But the light sleep is very soothing...very relaxing. I am very warm under the cozy covers. I know I have to get up when the alarm goes off, but that is a whole hour away.
Then it happens. The demon pee demands to be let out. Most people would just get up and pee, right? Not me. Lemme tell you, I fight that pee all the way to the toilet.
When I first feel the urge, I totally ignore it, as if ignoring it will somehow make it evaporate right through my bladder and skin and out of my body. But the pee is a persistent little bitch. It starts to become downright painful. And I'm like FUCK I am NOT getting up yet. I'm NOT! F U Pee. F U!!! The problem is that once I'm physically up that late in the morning, there is no going back to sleep.
I'm pissed off (heh) that the pee is controlling me. IT is making me get up when I don't want to. I want to control it and I want to pee on MY terms. If that isn't having issues, I don't know what is.
Sad to say...the pee always wins. 100% of the time. Pee has a 1000-0 record. It gets to the point where I'm about to wet the bed, and then I pretty much have to get up. It is quite a relief by that point to let it out, heh.
I'm like that at work, too. I don't wait nearly as long, but if I'm in the middle of a project at work, I feel resentful that I have to get up and pee. Such an interruption. What a "waste of time", ha ha.
This is the definition of being anal, or anal retentive. You are such a control freak and so obsessive compulsive about everything, that you will not poo when you are supposed to. Instead, you hold it in and wait until a time that is perfect for you; you retain it in the anus (should be the name of a song). I do that, too (poo almost always wins that battle, too, although its record is not quite as clean as pee's. However, the revenge it later takes is quite painful, and not worth the fight). I am certain that I would be classified as being "anal", as well, in my general personality. But not about all things.
Well, gotta go pee now. I've been fighting it through this entire post.
;-)
(or is it Pussy Patrol, not Control? Hell, I can't remember, and Google won't let me Google the word "pussy". Why not? :) )
This happens just about every morning: I'm in that early morning state of drifting in and out of a light sleep. But the light sleep is very soothing...very relaxing. I am very warm under the cozy covers. I know I have to get up when the alarm goes off, but that is a whole hour away.
Then it happens. The demon pee demands to be let out. Most people would just get up and pee, right? Not me. Lemme tell you, I fight that pee all the way to the toilet.
When I first feel the urge, I totally ignore it, as if ignoring it will somehow make it evaporate right through my bladder and skin and out of my body. But the pee is a persistent little bitch. It starts to become downright painful. And I'm like FUCK I am NOT getting up yet. I'm NOT! F U Pee. F U!!! The problem is that once I'm physically up that late in the morning, there is no going back to sleep.
I'm pissed off (heh) that the pee is controlling me. IT is making me get up when I don't want to. I want to control it and I want to pee on MY terms. If that isn't having issues, I don't know what is.
Sad to say...the pee always wins. 100% of the time. Pee has a 1000-0 record. It gets to the point where I'm about to wet the bed, and then I pretty much have to get up. It is quite a relief by that point to let it out, heh.
I'm like that at work, too. I don't wait nearly as long, but if I'm in the middle of a project at work, I feel resentful that I have to get up and pee. Such an interruption. What a "waste of time", ha ha.
This is the definition of being anal, or anal retentive. You are such a control freak and so obsessive compulsive about everything, that you will not poo when you are supposed to. Instead, you hold it in and wait until a time that is perfect for you; you retain it in the anus (should be the name of a song). I do that, too (poo almost always wins that battle, too, although its record is not quite as clean as pee's. However, the revenge it later takes is quite painful, and not worth the fight). I am certain that I would be classified as being "anal", as well, in my general personality. But not about all things.
Well, gotta go pee now. I've been fighting it through this entire post.
;-)
(or is it Pussy Patrol, not Control? Hell, I can't remember, and Google won't let me Google the word "pussy". Why not? :) )
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